


The Identity

by CityLightsInNYC



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Multi, also lots of fluff, everybody loves canada, lots of america and canada screen time, lots of family stuff, they're too pure for this world
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-05
Updated: 2019-04-26
Packaged: 2019-10-04 13:14:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 26,087
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17305250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CityLightsInNYC/pseuds/CityLightsInNYC
Summary: Living with brothers isn't easy. Especially when they're four, larger-than-life Personifications. Maelynn Bonnefoy thought her love life was the worst thing that happened to her until she's swept up into a world of terrorists, Nations, and chaos. Updates Saturdays.





	1. Nul

The silence was deafening. After hours of explosions, an entire cease of activity was strange. I didn't trust it was going to last, and I was right. Less than a minute later, the bombings continued above my head. Lucky for us, we were several hundred metres below the ground, so it did little more than rattle the hanging lights above.

Down and down we ran through the stairs, the clacking of our boots similar to the storm of bullets outside. I bared my teeth, narrowing my eyes as I stared above as if my gaze alone would cease the attack.

"Do they have no shame? They're firing on the house. His house! He's not even a part of this, and they're attacking his home." The girl at my side shook her head, grimacing.

"You think they're just gonna stand there while we're all here like sitting ducks?" She sighed. "Seriously, sometimes I really wonder about you." I raised a brow as she stopped running and embraced me. The familiar scent of home enveloped me. Immediately, my body relaxed, my heartbeat slowed. 

"Are you okay? Did I do something wrong?"  I said, grabbing her face. Her beautiful face. She laughed, her eyes watering. Her expression morphed as she ran her fingers lightly through my hair.

"Even after so long, you haven't changed a bit." She placed a kiss on my forehead, and I my skin tingled. I frowned, staring into her dark eyes, as if they held all the secrets of the universe.

"After this, it'll all be different," I whispered. Her lips twitched, and she tried to maintain a smile. She didn't speak, and my throat burned. "How much will I remember after today? You could walk past me a million times, and I would never recognize you."

"He said it'll wear off eventually. Ten, fifteen years at most. This isn't permanent. We'll," her voice faded. Just like I was about to. "We'll see each other again." I hugged her fiercely as if she would disappear if I let her go.

"I'm gonna miss you, Chrissy."

"I'll miss you too, Lys. I love you." My breath hitched. Even after so many years, she always blew me away with those three simple words. I tried to keep my voice steady. I failed miserably.

"I love you, too." We finally made it, greeted by a large metal door that was cool to the touch. Four people in the room turned. A man - a boy, really - gave me a smile, his glasses going foggy. My expression slipped, and all thoughts stopped in my head.

"Brother." I ran to him, wrapping my arms around his neck. My breath quickened as I held him tighter. I looked in his face for any sign of doubt.

"They're outside," I rushed. "They're outside. We don't have much time." He nodded, voice quivering.

"I know. I know. We have to move quickly. We'll be okay if we do." A lie we both knew, but truths were too difficult to handle. A voice brought us out of our frantic thoughts.

"We need to get to work. Now." I turned to my left. Two men, the two men who controlled my fate, stood there with all kinds of herbs, vials, and ancient books ready. A large circle drawn in chalk lay in the center of the barely lit room. Seeing them made my stomach drop.

"They could storm in at any moment," he continued. "Unfortunately, we cannot waste precious time saying goodbyes." I nodded, grabbing a paper from my pocket. Countless hours of writing and rewriting went into that single sheet. My hand stung at the memory. I turned to my brother, shoving it into his grasp.

"Once you find me again," My voice was strong, much stronger than I felt. "Once I'm ready, give this to me. If I contain even a shred of my old self, this will help." My voice went soft. "It has to."

"When will I know if you're ready?" I practically saw the wheels turning in his head. He thought he wasn't capable of taking on such a responsibility. But I trusted him. I tried to give him a reassuring smile, and I wondered how convincing it really looked.

"When the time comes, you'll know." He nodded at me, his expression determined but no less afraid. He stuffed it deep in his bag, making sure it didn't crumple. He turned to the two men, nodding. It was time.

"Are you ready?" They said. I turned around in a circle, eyeing the five people in the room. The only people who would remember me, at least for a while. And I wouldn't see all but one for a long time. 

I took a deep breath, then another, turning back to the two, eyes void of emotion.

"I'm ready." They nodded.

"Get in the circle." I walked quickly, trying to focus on my pounding heart instead of the blasts outside. Louder and louder the pounding grew until dust rained from the ceiling. Outside, they were becoming desperate. I turned, facing the two men holding the ancient text. I had never held a conversation with one, but I knew the other from a long time ago. We didn't have a good relationship until fairly recently, and I hadn't talked face-to-face with him in years.

"Now remember, this spell will only work on those of our kind, and the regular human beings." He turned to the man behind me. One who I only lately learned to tolerate. I suppressed the urge to sneer in his direction. Ultimately, his fate was in my hands. I would have to learn to trust him, for better or worse. "Our counterparts will not be affected by this spell."

"I understand." His voice was grave. A single scar outlined his face. "I'll do my best to protect her. I promise." It wasn't much, but a feather of weight disappeared from my chest. My lips turned up into a silent thanks.

"Good." They raised their hands. "Let's begin." They started chanting in a language I couldn't understand. The markings on the floor glowed a bright white, slowly illuminating the room. As they chanted, the light grew brighter and brighter, and a blinding hot pain seared my skull. I collapsed, vaguely hearing people calling my name.

"Maintain the circle! We cannot break the chant!" For a minute there was inky blackness, and all I could sense was pure anguish and the shouts of chanting consuming my very soul. Someone was screaming, but I couldn't understand what they were saying. Every sense was blotted out by the agony that overtook my body.

Then, the pain stopped. I thought the worst was over. I breathed a sigh of relief. 

Then the real torture started.

 I clutched my head, skull splitting in two. I then knew it was I screaming when I felt the blood drip from my mouth.

My life flashed before my eyes. Thousands of memories whizzed through my head. The images rushed, faster and faster, until it was just a cacophony of sights and sounds. Then, the pictures started to fade, as if someone was covering them out with white paint. The memories became hazy, until one by one they disappeared entirely.

As this happened, I felt my body shift, my heart seemed too big in my chest. Then it was my head that was too big. Every single proportion of my body just felt wrong. I couldn't comprehend all the changes at once. It was too much. Everything at that point was too much.

Slowly the pain abated, and the odd feeling disappeared. I breathed easier, every part of my being buzzing. My eyes were glued shut, and I felt, I felt. . .

How did I feel? I didn't know. Something was off, but I couldn't tell what. It was strange, and I couldn't explain it. My body felt weak. I couldn't stand. The cool floor chilled my body, and I shivered. Where. . .

Where was I? There was something I was supposed to remember, but I didn't know what. There was a reason I was there. It was important, but I didn't know why. It was because. . . because. . .

What was I about to say? I couldn't remember. My mind was hazy. My eyes finally decided to open, but I suddenly felt the urge to sleep. I was exhausted. I could hardly stay awake, though I didn't even know why I was trying in the first place.

The first thing I remembered hearing was footsteps. I looked up, and there was a strange man looking down at me. My head drooped, and my neck was sore.

"Who are you?" I mumbled. I didn't recognize my own voice. I noticed his eyes, the vibrant colours like spinning pinwheels. He was a much larger than I, my height barely up to the man's waist. He helped me stand. My vision blurred. 

"Your new big brother." He picked me up, and I instinctually placed my arms around his neck. My consciousness slipped as I felt him carry me somewhere. "You're going to live with me for a while."


	2. Un

"Ah, Miss Bonnefoy. Please take a seat." The school counselor, a middle aged woman, nudged a few papers at me. She was young and fairly docile, but she wasn't opposed to hitting me with her bedazzled fly swatter.

"So, what'd I do this time, Audrey?" I said merely glancing at the paper. Arranged in a pamphlet style, they featured overly happy teenagers smiling, studying and performing various academic activities. Talk about unrealistic expectations.

She merely sighed, used to me, especially considering I was in her office at least once a week. "We received your aptitude scores from the career selector test you took last Tuesday."

"Yeah?" I said half-heartedly, glancing around the room. She already lost my interest. I wondered what they had for lunch today. With luck I could sneak away to the bleachers and try to....

"And they were promising results, Miss Bonnefoy. Truly they were. However," she paused, choosing her words carefully. "We noticed you merely chose one career as a possible job." I give her a smirk, a ready response waiting on my tongue.

"Well drug-dealer and hooker weren't an option so..." She gave me a pointed look. I showed my hands in mock surrender. "What? It's not my fault you don't have good choices. If anything, you should be more inclusive."

Every year, the school made all of the students go on a stupid website and take a quiz that determines your "perfect career path." This included going through thousands of jobs and reading boring paragraphs about a bunch of things I didn't want to do. The whole thing was pointless. And a few friends and I just loved to mess around with the system. Which usually meant making Christmas tree patterns with the letter choices and dicking around with the free responses.

But I wasn't up for it this year. So, I merely filled out the survey honestly, picking the job I knew would be my future. She rubbed her temples, not bothering to hide her frustration. She must have in a bad mood that day, because I swore I saw a few grey hairs show up on her head each time I spoke.

"Please, Maelynn. You have to at least humor us," she scoffed. "and think more about prospective careers. You're a junior now. You have to take school more seriously." I pursed my lips. She continued.

"All I'm saying is you need to choose two more careers to consider as future jobs. Nothing more." I merely rolled my eyes. I was getting tired of this.

"I already know what I'm going to be. A chef. I'm going to go to culinary school. I'm going to work with the best of the best. Then I'm going to be world-class." She seemed skeptical. "Not immediately, but I know my future already.  I don't need this stupid test any more than I need this school." She took on a patronizing tone.

"Maelynn, you can't put all your eggs in one basket. Especially with the job you chose. Culinary work takes years of school and skill," She seemed to wince at her own words. "And you have a very small chance of being able to support yourself with it. What if something happens to you? Physically or otherwise? What if you decide you don't like it or can't put up with school? You can't possibly be sure you'll make it in the restaurant business. You need a backup plan." I narrowed my eyes. giving  her a sickly-sweet smile.

"Fine," I gritted my teeth. "I saw fast food cashier as an option. And waitress, too. Put that on there." I grabbed my bag.

"Maelynn, wait." I didn't stop. "Please, take this seriously." I rolled my eyes.

"It's a stupid survey. It's not like it's a job application." I think back to something I heard Fae say, repeating it exactly. "It's a pointless activity designed by the school system to make them feel like they're actually teaching us useful shit."

"Language!"

"French," I retorted. She gave me that stern look again, and I just waved her off. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. I'm graduating in three semesters. I'm tired of dealing with this crappy school system." Even after my little speech, Audrey still made me fill out the survey before I could go back to class. It really sucked because she watched me while I was doing it - she knew I would take forever out of spite - and made me go back to class just in time for lunch.

"What did they want?" Travis had his mouth stuffed, his long hair nearly covering his eyes. I sighed.

"Fill out that stupid survey." His partner, a kid in twelfth grade, snickered, draping his arm over the boy's shoulder. Travis only gave a small blush, ducking his head slightly, a smile creeping on his face.

"Told you they'd make you fill it out." I rolled my eyes, sneering.

"Shut up, homo." He tried to hold back a laugh, seeing past my 'insult.'

"Takes one to know one." The table went quiet as a tray clinked two seats to my left. Our eyes shifted to our plates. Travis whispered to his partner just quiet enough to be indistinguishable.

"Hey, guys," she said. We all mumbled a reply back, not really looking at her. It took a lot of self-control not to stare at her new haircut. She wasn't making it easy. Her hair used to be the longest in the school, flowing all the way past her back in all of its unnatural, red glory. But now it was a short, scraggly brown, bringing out the green in her eyes. Some said she looked like a completely different person, but I thought she looked more like herself than she ever had before.

"So Fae," Travis said. "How was the math test today?" She shrugged, taking a bite of her cold, prepackaged lunch.

"Pretty easy." She paused. "If you actually paid attention." I couldn't help but flinch, and I could tell everyone noticed.. "But you know," her voice went icy. "If you didn't give it your all, then you don't really deserve the happiness of a good grade, now do you?"

They went silent, picking at their food awkwardly. I bit my tongue, trying not to start a screaming match with her again. My throat still hurt from last time, or maybe it was from crying. I wasn't sure.

"Someone's still bitter, I see." Her eye twitched so I knew she heard. But other than that she made no move to respond. My voice softened. "Fae-"

"And I saw another girl cheating on the test." My heart sunk. "I mean, how stupid can you get? The teacher was looking right at her, too. Of course, she got caught." She shook her head, sneering. "It takes zero effort not to cheat on someone." She wasn't even trying to hide her true message anymore.

My blood boiled, and I felt the hot tears well up. I couldn't let hersee me cry. I couldn't let her see how much her words hurt me.

I dropped my utensils loudly, my mouth going numb. Sighing slowly, I grabbed my bag and headed out the door. When I heard Travis call out to me, I ran.

It was pointless, though. He knew where I was heading. I just didn't want him to stop me before I started. After that, there was nothing he could do. And he knew that, too. That was probably why he was running after me.

I found the spot during freshman year. It was under the bleachers of the football field away from any prying eyes. The open air allowed for any suspicious smells to dissipate, and there were no outdoor classes during fourth period.

When Travis found me, he snatched the bill from my hand, but it was too late. The beautiful, white powder was already taking its effect. I sighed, hugging my knees. He cursed, stomping out the lines.

"Cocaine. Fucking cocaine. How do you even get this stuff?" I didn't answer him. He knew exactly who I got it from. "You have to find a better way to cope with your breakup. This isn't healthy."

"She refuses to talk to me about it. If she'd just let me explain," My words were already beginning to slur. My highs loosened my tongue, getting rid of the small filter I already had. But it was better than being sober, I guessed. Not by a lot, though.

"She did catch you with that boy, though." Before I could talk back, he cut me off. I'm not saying you cheated, but it did look pretty sketchy."

"That's not what happened. If she would listen to me-" He sighed, cutting me off. He kneeled to my level, trying to look me in the eyes. I shifted away from his gaze. My head felt woozy. I saw double.

"Look, I'm not gonna take sides. You know that. But you're my best friend. I can't bear to see you like this. And I definitely know Fae would hate to see you like this, too."

"Whatever. Not like I care much anymore." I mumbled, just talking to myself at that point. "I'll just snort away my problems. See how much she likes that." He frowned, absolutely livid.

"Why are you like this?" He whispered. "Why do I always have to find you like this?" His voice cracked. "Do you not trust me? Can you tell me nothing?" I stayed silent. His voice lowered. "Your family's worried about you." My eyes focused, just barely though. "They call me almost every day. Allen, Matt, even François. And you know how chill most of them are. They'll give you your space. But Oliver." He paused. "He's worried sick. I don't know what he'd do if-" He stopped, clearing his throat. I heard the tears In his voice. "We can't lose you. Please. You're my best friend. I can't lose you."

The faint sound of the bell rang across the field. Travis didn't wait for me, walking off. He knew I would follow. I always did and prayed to God I always would.

"If I ever find you like that again I'm personally calling the police." And I knew he meant it.

I knew how to hide a high well. Years of practice and copying my brothers trained me. It was both a really good thing and really, really bad thing. During that time, I never wanted to admit that I had a problem. Even years later, I still had a hard time coming to terms with it. I never called it an addiction. Addiction meant I was sick and broken. That wasn't what I was. At least, I didn't think I was.

They ignored me for the most part. Travis just shook his head in disappointment. At least, I thought it was disappointment. I was pretty sure I did a bit than normal, and I had a hard time doing much of anything.

At the last bell, I breathed a sigh of relief. No one had mentioned anything, at least, none of the teachers did. I already knew what was coming when I walked out the door.

Travis sat in his car, ready to pick me up. I hauled my bike into his trunk, hopping in the back seat. I tried not to pay attention to his partner's whispers.

"Why do you still hang out with her? She's bringing you down, babe. You can't solve all of her problems."

"She's my friend. I can't just abandon her."

I tried not to murder his stupid little boy-toy. He was already pissed at me, and he was my only ride back home.

"I want this to be the last time I have to drive you back home." I said nothing, trying to focus on the carpeting. "I mean it. No more of these hard drugs. I know I can't stop all of it but," he sighed. "Please. I don't want to see you do something you'll regret."

"Okay," I muttered. My head was starting to clear up. He let out an exasperated sigh.

"No. Not okay. I'm serious. I want you to promise me you're going to try to cut out all of these drugs. I don't care about the vaping or the weed, but I want this to be the last time you get high off your ass. Promise me." I sighed.

"I promise." He stopped right in front of my house. I didn't bother saying goodbye to his boyfriend. I knew Travis would insist on waiting for me to walk into my house, and I heard the car rev quietly as I shut the door.

Before anyone could see me I ran to my room as fast as I could. I slid my back against the door, collapsing to the floor. I covered my eyes, trying to calm my racing mind. My head was pounding and the light hurt. The drug was slowly wearing off, and I tried to distract myself. My hand was itching to reach for the stash under my bed, but I knew that doing more than a couple lines was dangerous. But my body just learned to ignore the warning signs.

By dinner time, they all noticed. Every single one of them. They were all smart enough and had enough run-ins with hardcore drugs to know something was up. Allen and Matt just sighed, shaking their heads. François didn't seem to care, half conscious on the couch. But Oliver. Oh God, Oliver.

In a lot of ways, I realized, he was just like Travis. He always worried about me. Sometimes more than necessary. His hands shook as he made dinner. I tried to make myself small on the couch - the living room had the only TV in the house - as I heard the distinct sound of the knife.

"So how was school, Maelynn?" His voice sounded innocent enough, but I learned over the years that Oliver was most dangerous when he used that sweet tone. Especially when paired with my full name.

"Fine," I said, trying to keep my voice steady. As my body relaxed, I felt my stomach churn. My breath caught in my throat, and I knew exactly what was happening. My head felt woozy, but I didn't dare show that.

"Oh, really? Because that's not what your friend told me." My body froze, and the blood drained from my face. I stopped breathing.

"Travis said you had a pretty rough day. Something about a spoiled lunch and food poisoning." I said nothing. His voice went sharp. "And an incident on the football field." I kept my sights trained on the TV, feeling everyone's gaze.

"Are you going to answer me or not?" 

I flinched, beads of sweat rolling down my face.

"Well?" he said, his voice jarring my brain.

"I just, I mean-" The bubbling in my stomach became more violent, and I started to hyperventilate. My body shook, and I lowered my head into my hands. The feeling quickly rose into my chest and up to my throat. I felt my body move on instinct, and I quickly stood.

"Bathroom." 

Twenty minutes later, I was lying in a heap on the bathroom floor, a cold towel on my forehead. François walked in and just looked at me. I didn't say anything. I couldn't. He sighed, rubbing his neck. 

"Take some benadryl. It'll help with the nausea and let you fall asleep faster. Drink some water with it. You're probably dehydrated." His voice hammered into my head, though I knew he was whispering. I lifted my head slightly, quickly setting it back down after the pounding became too much.

"Can you grab some for me?" He raised a brow and just rolled his eyes.

"Get it yourself, kid. You put that shit in your body, you can deal with the consequences." I shut my eyes, his footsteps becoming quieter.

"Bitch," I muttered. "At least get someone else to do it." 

"Whatever." I felt a little bit of relief when Matt walked in a few minutes later, a box in one hand and a cup in the other. He lowered down to me, holding out a small pill to my face.

"Take it." Slowly lifting my head, I had to get his help to swallow it, the water cooling my sore throat.

"Thanks," I croaked. God, I even sounded like a druggie. He sat down next to me, rubbing my back gently. He sighed.

"You really messed up, Lynn." I said nothing. "You messed up real bad. Allen's getting your pjs, and François's trying to calm Oliver down. Lucky for you, we know how to deal with this kind of shit."

"I've been treating you guys for years." He let out a sad chuckle, pulling my hair back away from the toilet. I winced. He noticed.

"Well, this whole thing is a lesson, I guess." I gave a weak smirk.

"Don't turn into my brothers? I agree. You guys suck." Allen walked into the bathroom, throwing some clothes at me. He gave me a glare, clearly pissed.

"Get dressed, kid. And don't think for a second that you're not going to school tomorrow." He slammed the door, the noise jarring my brain. I didn't have the strength to roll my eyes.

"Someone's pissy," I muttered.

"You're an idiot," Matt said, helping me up. I stumbled, holding onto his arm for balance. He walked me to my bed and turned out the lights. "I'll talk to them for you. But they're gonna be mad for a couple of days. We'll talk more about this in the morning. Just get some rest for now." I muttered a thanks, trying to fall asleep as fast as possible.

But I just couldn't. I kept thinking about how Fae would always hate me. I knew I messed up, both with the drugs and with our relationship. I was just too proud to admit it.

I wondered how I would ever fix this. Maybe I should've apologised to Fae. I could stop doing coke, but I knew all of that would be difficult. For a brief moment, I just wished to disappear for a while, leaving all of my problems behind me. Start a new life.Run away with someone. But I didn't have anyone to run away with. Not anymore.


	3. Deux

Of course, Fae refused to move seats at lunch. We shared the same friends since middle school, and we weren't going to give them up because of our fight, however bloody it may be.

"Did you hear? One of the seniors got caught cheating and now the whole class has detention," My eye twitched. Fae spoke nonchalantly, eating and talking simultaneously. "And he even had the audacity to say that he didn't cheat. Can you believe that? How stupid can you be to get caught in the act and still deny anything happened." She didn't even glance at me, looking to the two boys in front of us. "What do you guys think?"

"Well, it's not really our place to say. We don't want to get involved with the drama." Travis raised a brow, and his partner ducked his head, trying to go unnoticed. I would almost feel bad for him if it weren't for his barbed remarks.

"Yeah, Fae," I spoke up. "You're always trying to get them to choose sides. Lay off." Like always, she pretended not to notice me.

"Well I think the whole thing's completely stupid. He shouldn't have cheated in the first place. If he wasn't happy with his grade, he could have told the teacher, or something." I gritted my teeth.

"Look, I told you it was a misunderstanding. I tried to tell the creep no, but he wouldn't get off me."

"I'd be more likely to believe you if I hadn't found you talking to him earlier." My face paled.

"You went through my texts." She stayed silent. I felt my self loathing turn to rage. "You fucking read my texts, didn't you?" Her face was blank, hiding all emotions, but I could tell she felt at least a little guilty about what she'd done.

"I knew something was going on between you two." Her voice was low, just above a whisper. "I just had to make sure. And I was right."

"Fae," Travis said, his face falling. The boy gripped his shoulder. He whispered something into his boyfriend's ear. I tried to listen, but all I could hear were a few words about a 'fight' and 'worth it.'

"That's it." I stood up, looking straight at her. "If you want to be petty, go ahead. But I'm tired of trying to talk with you anymore." I turned to the two boys. "If you want to find me, I'll be in the library."

Before anyone could say anything I stormed off. No one came after me, and a few people in the hallways quickly moved out of my way, seeing how mad I was. I had a reputation of being, as Allen put it, 'pissy and fucking nuts.'

"What are you doing?" Travis sighed when he found me on the library floor, crouched between the shelves and repeatedly slamming my head with a book.

"Coping," I said, getting into a good rhythm. "I'm not allowed to do anything fun, so this is the next best option."

"Repeatedly slamming your head with a book?"

"Yes."

"You're so stup- how can you even walk and breathe at the same time?" The librarian shushed us.

"I fucked up, Travis. I fucked up real bad," I whispered. He scoffed.

"We know. Just apologize to her already."

"I can't."

"Well why not?"

"Because I didn't do anything!" That caused the librarian to shush louder. Luckily, she didn't have the capacity to throw us out.

"Because I didn't do anything," I said quieter. "I keep telling her that he tried to push himself onto me. He's been coming onto me for weeks, and I've been trying to keep him away. I never cheated on her. I never had sex with that God awful slug, and I never will."

"Yeah, but she did find your texts with- what was his name again?"

"Martin."

"Right. Martin. And Fae found your texts with him. She showed me, and they were pretty...explicit."

"I thought he was joking!" He paused.

"If It were anyone else," he said slowly, "I would think you were lying." He turned to me. "You really didn't know he was flirting with you?"

"No... I mean yes. It's just-" I groaned, placing my head into my hands. "I knew he had a little crush on me." Travis gave me a pointed look at the word 'little.' "But that's all I thought it was. I didn't know he would try to get with me." I shuddered. "He was disgusting. Trying to shove his tongue down my... and his hands up my..." I couldn't go on. I thought I would throw up on that old, library carpet.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't know it was that bad." I said nothing. No 'it's okay' or 'that's alright' because it wasn't okay, it wasn't alright.

"It was my fault, in a way. I lied to Fae. I told her I was at the movies when I went to the game with that creep." My fists balled. "I shouldn't have lied."

"You shouldn't have," he agreed. I rolled my eyes.

"Gee, thanks." He shrugged.

"Sorry, but you wanted the truth. Now let's go." He looked over the shoulder where the librarian glared. "I think everyone's tired of your pity party."

* * *

The guys, save for Matt, all left to spend the Friday night out. It was just the two of us until the next day, and I sighed, knowing that we would have to deal with two, possibly three, hungover brothers the next morning. Lucky for us, Oliver always had the kitchen stocked with coffee and Tylenol for these common occurrences.

Matt and I just decided to watch some movies that night while I sneakily avoided my weekend homework.

"So, Lynn," he started, taking a handful of kettle corn. "There's this old friend of mine that's going to be in town for a few weeks. I told him a bit about you, and he'd really like to meet you." I rolled my eyes.

"You told one of your weird friends about me? Gross." I was half teasing, but also half serious. Some of Matt's friends were really shady, and most of them I wouldn't walk past them in a dark alley. He huffed.

"He's not weird," he paused. "Well, not really." I laughed. "Look, he's different. I'll give him that. But not for the reasons you'd expect. He's actually a really nice guy."

"Oh yeah?" I stuffed my face. God how I loved popcorn. "What's his name?" His face turned pink, turning away from my gaze. He let out a nervous cough.

"Um, it's Matthew." It was silent for a moment, and it took me a while , and then I burst into laughter. I clutched my stomach, trying not to choke on my popcorn. Eventually though, I coughed, a few pieces flying from my mouth.

"Oh, God. Gross," he grimaced. I couldn't stop laughing. Tears dotted my eyes.

"Are you serious? Your friend's name is Matthew? What do you guys even talk about? The fact that your name's so generic?" An idea sprung in my head, and I snickered. "Hey, if you have a child with that dude, you could name him 'Mattie.' Then you'd be 'Matt, Matthew, and Mattie.'" I could hear him facepalm.

"What the fuck did you take this morning?" he groaned. I shook my head, smiling.

"You don't even want to know, man." He ran a hand through his hair, giving me a glare. He almost looked concerned. Then again, Matt probably did worse than me when he was in high school. That's why everyone in the house basically let me do whatever without too much worrying. Well, except for Oliver. Sometimes I wondered if that guy did anything wrong. Of course, his crazy temper could beg to differ.

"You're so immature. He agreed to meet us for coffee at your work on Monday. Don't show up there drunk." I folded my arms, turning my nose up.

"Oh, come on. What do you take me for, an addict?" He opened his mouth. "Don't answer that," I said quickly. "But I'm not gonna show up wasted in front of Mr. Taylor." Seriously, my boss would kill me. And he was one of the few adults whose opinions - secretly - mattered to me.

"Ok fine," he muttered, sounding like he didn't believe me. "You're seventeen years old. You're old enough to control your own life. You don't need your big brother controlling your life 24/7." I smiled.

"Thanks. And would you mind telling that to Oliver while you're at it?" He ran a hand through his hair.

"Maelynn-"

"Uh oh," I interrupted. "The full name. That can't be good." He rolled his eyes, ruffling my hair a bit.

"He's just worried about you. We know you're an angsty teen - don't give me that look, you know you are - and," his voice went low. "We're all worried that you're getting into some heavy shit." I narrowed my eyes.

Something clicked in my mind.

"They didn't go out just to party, did they?" He gave a wry smile.

"They knew you were more likely to listen if it was just one-on-one." I rolled my eyes.

"So what? Al and François are just magically resisting the temptation to go out drinking? You know they're still gonna come back home wasted." I smirked. "Isn't it a bad example to come home drunk after lecturing me about not using drugs anymore?" He shrugged.

"Oliver made them promise not to get drunk. Well, too drunk. Even he knows how stupid they can be." He began muttering to himself. "Hopefully, we won't have to carry their asses too far to their own beds." We both laughed at that, and some of the seriousness seemed to disappear. We payed a little more attention to the movie.

"But seriously. At least try to cut back a bit." He spoke quickly before I could say anything. "I know it's difficult, and I know you're going through some stuff after, you know. . ." He didn't even say her name, and it still caused my chest to hurt. "But please. That stuff is dangerous. I'm not saying you have to quit cold turkey or, God forbid, go to rehab. Just try to find some healthier ways to cope. All of us," he was referring to the four of them. "Know how much that shit can mess up a person's life." I huffed, and he raised his hands in exasperation.

"I'm serious, Lynn. Please. We don't want to come home to see you dead from overdose. It would suck to bury you even before you graduated high school." His words sunk in slowly, and the atmosphere seemed tense. After a while, I replied.

"Alright. I'll try to cut back a bit," I smiled. "Besides, I can't become a famous chef if I'm addicted to coke. I thought for a bit. "Well, it would be a lot harder."

"There's one more thing," Matt said, stuffing his face again. "So, the other three don't really get along with Matthew. They don't like him that much." I scrunched my eyes.

"Like on a scale from cats to slow drivers-"

"Crying children." My eyes widened.

"Damn. That bad, huh? Why?" He shook his head, exasperated.

"Stupid shit. Old rivalries, misconceptions. Stuff like that. But Matthew's a really nice guy. He's not like the rest of my friends. He's actually," he paused, thinking for a moment. "Look, I'll put it this way, Lynn. Matthew's never been arrested before." My mouth dropped open. I let out a laugh.

"Seriously?" He shook his head.

"Never. Not even for a misdemeanor." I let out a low whistle.

"Wow. Didn't know you even had friends like that." He shrugged, knowing the kind of crowd he ran with. But for Matt to have a clean, a normal, friend just seemed weird.

"So, please, don't say anything to the others about this. And especially don't bring up any names." I huffed.

"What's in it for me?" He sighed, giving me a sideways look. I put up my hands in defeat, smirking to myself. "Hey, if you want me to keep a secret, you have to pay the price. I don't just keep my mouth shut for free."

"Man, we raised you too well," he muttered. "How about free food at Taylor's cafe? I'll even buy your favorite." I rolled my eyes.

"Ok, sure that's a start. What else?"

"You greedy bi- fine. How about five bucks."

"Fifty," I smiled, he gritted his teeth.

"Ten."

"Fourty."

"Fifteen."

"Thirty."

"Twenty."

"Deal." He rolled his eyes, running a hand through his hair.

"God, you're gonna grow up to be a loan shark, kid." I tapped my chin, pretending to think.

"Hmm, well it's a possibility." I shrugged. "But nah. Not interested." He breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank God. Within a year you'd have everyone in the province under some kind of debt."

"Hey, I'm not as sleazy as you think." He scoffed.

"Yeah. You're probably worse, pipsqueak."

"Am not. And stop calling me pipsqueak!"

"Sure, when you stop being one."

". . .I hate you."


	4. Trois

For once in my life, I was glad that Fae wasn't in the majority of my classes. During the beginning of the year, we both chose seats right next to each other in the back of the class. After we broke up, Fae immediately demanded to change to a seat as far away from me as possible. It was always difficult to meet her gaze.

My science teacher was out on Thursday, so we basically had a free day to talk. Which meant everyone was gossiping. It didn't matter much to me, except for the fact that a few people began to talk about me behind my back.

"What's been up with those emo girls lately? I thought they were dating or something." My eye twitched, and I tried not to scream at them. The teachers would definitely blame me for it. They were always trying to get rid of me and get me expelled.

"Didn't you hear? They broke up like a week ago."

"What happened? They've been dating for, like, three years. I thought they were looking to get married, or whatever it is the gays do." I rolled my eyes, turning my ear towards them. Sometimes I really hated the fact that Québec's so Catholic.

"Yeah. But apparently Lynn cheated on her with some weird senior guy from Rosemont High."

"Damn. When did that happen?" Another girl chimed in.

"During the last football game. Fae caught Lynn trying to sleep with the guy behind the bleachers during the game."

"You mean soccer?"

"Yeah, yeah. Soccer. Football, whatever. Point is, now they hate each other. I hear Lynn is now going out with the guy she cheated on Fae with."

"That's low even for her."

"I know. I heard she's a drug addict now. Like some real big shit like heroin and meth." It was cocaine, but whatever.

"Gross. I can't wait for her to get caught. Everyone just wants those dykes out of school. Hopefully they'll get expelled, too. Her and her little homo friends." That's when I'd had enough.

"Hey. You got something to say to me?" All of them jumped, their eyes wide with fear. The room went quiet. One of the girls must have felt either brave or stupid, because she actually answered back.

"Mind your own business. Isn't there something you should be snorting right about now?"

"Isn't there an STI infected dick you should suck right about now? Oh I forgot, you already did that in first period." Everyone snickered. Her face went red, and they all went back to their desks, speaking in hushed tones.

God, I really hated high school. Everyone was so clique-y, and people were always talking behind my back. No one ever minded their own business, and I swore the teachers were always out to get me.

I was surprised how true their gossip about me really was. Yes, this - not completely unattractive - guy was hitting on me last week at the football game. But I had known him for about a month. We met at a concert and had a lot of things in common. A few days before the game, he asked me out on a date, and I said no. He seemed alright with it and hoped we could still be friends.

I never told Fae because I thought it wasn't a big deal. But she absolutely flipped out. It wasn't the worst fight we'd ever had, but it was pretty bad. Nevertheless, we made up.

But then, the guy decided to show up at the football game. We hung out a bit, but then things got awkward. He said he had something to show me behind the bleachers. He started to get really creepy and tried to make a pass at me. I tried to tell him no, to back off before I broke his nose.

Then Fae decided to look for me and caught us in a compromising position. She didn't even let me explain. She knew who the guy was and probably just expected the worst. She just ran off with tears in her eyes, driving off quickly in her car.

That really sucked because she drove me there.

She didn't answer any of my texts during the weekend. I almost went to talk to Allen and Matt for girlfriend advice. Almost.

* * *

"Wow. This dude sure is punctual." Matt pointed out his friend as we neared the café's entrance. He had light blond hair and an innocent, cherubic expression. His professional dress was clear of any wrinkles and stains, his posture formal but at the same time relaxed. Appearing to be a bit younger than Matt, he was looking at the overhead menu. Matt smirked at me.

"I didn't know you knew the word 'punctual.'" I rolled my eyes. punching him in the shoulder.

"Shut up. I'm smart and you know it." He shrugged, still smirking.

"Whatever you say, pipsqueak." I groaned. 

Brothers.

As soon as we entered, the guy's head shot up, as if he sensed us. He seemed startled, like he had seen a ghost. He looked familiar. I couldn't quite explain in. He got up and shook my brother's hand.

"Matt," he stuttered, face going pink. "Hey. It's good to see you again." He turned towards me and for some reason, I froze. For a few moments, we just stared at each other, as if under some kind of spell. Matt nudged me, and I felt myself focus again.

"Hey," I said. "I'm Lynn. You're Matthew, right?" He looked shocked that I knew his name, but I couldn't understand why. I noticed a little hair that was out of place that stood up at an unnatural angle. It was very similar to Matt's. Come to think of it, the two looked very similar, almost like brothers. Or cousins.

"Yeah.”

"Nice to meet you." He flinched, letting out a hesitant smile, the corners of his lips twitching.

"Yeah. Nice to meet you, too." There was a pause before Matt cleared his throat.

"I'll go get us the drinks." He turned to me. "Same thing as always?" I nodded, and he walked to the counter, leaving the two of us alone. We sat down on opposite sides. I tapped my fingers on the table, looking around the room as if I didn't already know it like the back of my hand. We didn't say anything for a while, but I couldn't contain the question that consumed my thoughts since the moment I saw him.

"So, not to be weird or anything, but are the two of you related or something?" He seemed startled by my comment and started fidgeting in his seat.

"No. I mean, not really no." I raised an eyebrow, folding my arms.

"What do you mean 'not really no?'" He looked back to the counter, as if waiting for Matt to come back.

"We've just," He seemed distracted, looking past the window. "We've known each other for a long time. But we're not biologically related." I nodded.

"Family by choice, not by blood?" It was more of a statement than a question. He nodded, and I felt like I understood him a little better.  "So, what are you in town for? Matt just said you were here in business."

"Oh, I'm, um, I work for the government," he rubbed his neck sheepishly. "Intelligence agency. It's actually kind of top secret so..." he trailed off. I nodded again.

"Ok. That's pretty cool." Matt came back with three drinks and my bagel.

"Thanks, bro." He always knew what I wanted, because I almost always ordered the exact same thing. I loved their salmon bagels. It was Mr. Taylor's specialty and one of the reasons I decided to work for him.

"So how old are you, Lynn?" I swallowed.

"Seventeen. I'm graduating high school next year." He gave a hesitant smile, and I looked to Matt. Something felt wrong, but neither one addressed this fact. I felt the unexplainable tension in the air.

I decided to ask. "Are you okay?" I tried to keep my voice low. He furrowed his brows at me.

"What do you-"

"You seem off. I don't know." Both of them gave me shocked looks. I raised a brow. "What?" They quickly tried to act normal, looking away from me.

"Nothing," Matthew said quickly. "It's fine. I'm fine. So you're a junior in high school? Are you going to college after you graduate?" He changed topics rather forcefully, and I let him.

"Culinary school. There are some good ones in France and America, and the guys - my brothers - said they'd support me. And even though I don't really speak English anymore, I still know it since I was raised in Ontario."

"I see, well if you ever do study abroad, I've got a couple friends in D.C and one in Paris. Maybe one day you could meet them."

"Ok. Thanks, I guess."

He told me a bit about his house in Toronto. He mentioned his love for the winter sports, and we talked a bit about hockey and some of our favourite players. Turns out, we had a lot in common.

We talked for a little over an hour. Well, it was mostly me and Matthew doing the talking. I knew Matt wasn't the chattiest person in the world, but he was uncharacteristically silent. I actually came to like Matthew a bit. I didn't know what it was, but something about him felt trustworthy.  In a way. I felt like I already knew him even though I never saw him before today.

He seemed like a sweet guy. It was a nice change from the my brother's usual friends. Most of them I wouldn't touch with a twenty foot pole. Seriously, they were disgusting.

"Oh, maple," he muttered, looking at his phone. "It's already six. I'm running late." He turned to Matt. "I gotta go. There's a meeting downtown that, well, they would kill me if I didn't show up." He turned to me, giving a warm smile. "It was nice meeting you, Lynn. Maybe we could talk again sometime." I nodded, returning his smile.

"Yeah. Didn't you say you were staying for the rest of the week?"

"Yeah. So if you guys want to hang out again, just give me a call." He blushed, moving his gaze to the floor. "Matt, you have my number, right?"

"Yeah. I'll give you a call later tonight." My brother smiled. Actually smiled.

"Alright, good. Well then, I guess I'll see you guys later then."

"See you later, Maple Leaf." His eyes widened just a fraction before leaving the cafe, his cheeks dusted with red.

* * *

"So, what did you think of Matthew?" I waved goodbye to Mr. Taylor as I closed the door to the cafe. We had stayed a long time and it was already late in the day. I groaned as I thought about all of the homework I wouldn't do.

"He actually seems pretty cool. Cooler than you." He raised a brow, folding his arms.

"Oh, really?" I nodded, mirroring his expression.

"Yup. Of course, that's not really a high standard," I teased. He just rolled his eyes, smirking as he ruffled my hair. I let out a squeak of protest, punching his arm lightly.

"You're such a dork," he muttered. I didn't bother replying.

"So, Matt," I asked after a while. "Do you have a thing for him?" He stopped walking, his face going a deep shade of pink. He stuttered, trying to find a response. I smiled at him triumphantly. "Ha. I knew it," I slung an arm over his shoulder. "Just so you know, man, you have my blessing." I laughed as his face went even darker.

"Shut up," he stuttered. I laughed a bit more, trying to calm myself down. He eventually sighed.

"Was it that obvious?" I nodded.

"Oh yeah. Definitely. Of course, I don't think he really noticed. Or maybe he didn't mind," I smirked at him. "Maybe he has a thing for you."

"You think so?" I could tell he was trying to act nonchalant, but I easily saw through his tough-guy act. Honestly, my brothers were so easy to read.

"Seemed like it. He sounded pretty interested in you. And he definitely seems to play for your team, if you know what I'm saying." 

"Shut up. You're so immature." I rolled my eyes, quickly going back onto the sidewalk.

"Whatever," I muttered. "You know I'm right."

* * *

Fae was still ignoring me. Even when I tried to talk to her, she would act like a child.

"Did you hear that, guys?" she would say. "I thought I heard something. But maybe it was just my imagination. You know how wild it can be sometimes." I usually just let it pass, knowing it was just how she was trying to cope through the breakup.

"Fine. Be that way." I would mumble. She would still pretend not to hear me, starting a new conversation with Travis.

The next day, though, she didn't even make this exchange. She just ignored me, continuing with her conversations.

"So, Fae, did you see the football game last night? We won three to one." I would say. She smiled to Travis, baring her teeth.

"And so of course I told her to lay off. It's my goddamn life." His boyfriend seemed really uncomfortable, and Travis looked like he was either going to cry or throw up. Probably both.

"Yeah. It was a pretty good game. It would've been cool if you'd watched it. I know how much you love football." I shrugged, feeling my throat burn. My hand twitched. God how much I wanted to turn to a bottle. No, I had to face my problems, not hide behind alcohol. "Of course, you know, maybe you really don't like the game. You never said it outright. Maybe I just read all the signs wrong. You know how I can be." Her eyes narrowed, still not looking at me.

"Oh, that's how it is? That's your excuse? 'You know how I can be?' That's a pretty lame excuse, even for you." My fist clenched.

"So you're finally talking to me now? That's a step in the right direction."

"Well if insulting you is a step in the right direction, then I should do it more often."

"It'd be better than you ignoring me." She finally turned to me, looking me in the eyes. My breath froze, and I tried to glare back at her.

"Is that a fact?" She whispered.

"Yeah. It is. Are you gonna start challenging facts now?"

"Of course not. Remember, I'm not you. I'm an honest person, not some lying piece of sh-"

"That's enough!" A tray slammed. Both of us jumped, eyes wide. Travis stood, head hanging low. His hair hid his eyes, body shaking.

"Trav-" Leon tried to calm him down, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"No! I'm sick of this. All week you two have been going at it and acting like children. You know, you can do whatever you want with your relationship. Get back together. Stay broken up. But, Jesus Christ, stop being at each other's throats. It's getting annoying. No, it's been annoying. Adam and I are fed up with it, and if you two continue acting like this, find some other lunch table to sit at. We're done with you two." He grabbed his food, his eyes red and glassy. "Come on, Adam." And just like that, he stormed off, nearly running for the door.

Adam's shoulders sagged, and he rubbed his neck, seeming worn out. "He's right, you know. Do whatever you want, but we're just tired of this fighting. Picking sides." He looked to me. "And we both know it's not healthy," he turned to Fae. "for either of you." He picked up his belongings, turning to the door. "Now I have to go try to calm him down." After that, we were alone together. We didn't speak, didn't even move. We just sat there, letting all of what they said sink in.

"God, this is stupid," she laughed bitterly. I flinched. "They're right. We've been acting stupid. And then what's worse is that we dragged them into it." I nodded slowly, running a hand through my hair.

"I know. This is all just a huge piece of shit." She gave a small laugh, and my lip turned up just a bit.

"That's a blunt way to put it, yeah."

"For what it's worth," I said."This whole fight made me learn his name. 'Adam.' So generic." She laughed. "I'm really sorry. I know you probably don't believe me, but I'm really, really sorry." She shook her head, sighing.

"It's going to take a bit of time to trust what you say again," she muttered. "But I accept your apology. Though, I'm still not ready to forgive you. Not yet." I sighed, giving a small smile.

"I can live with that." We didn't say anything for a while, just listening to the sounds of the cafeteria. Despite the drama that was happening in our group, no one else paid any attention. I guess it just goes to show that no matter how big your problems are, the world keeps turning.

"Just so you know, this doesn't really change much between us. We're not friends yet. I'm still mad at you." I gave her a cheeky grin, trying to lighten the mood just a little.

"Hey, you're talking to me, aren't you? That's a pretty big step in my book." I could tell she was trying to suppress a smile. Even she couldn't resist my charm.

"I'm serious, Lynn." She covered her face with one hand, taking on a more serious tone. "What happened is going to stick with me for a long time. I don't think it's something I'm ever going to forget."

"I know," I lowered my eyes to the floor. "I'm just glad you're talking to me again." The bell rang, and I grabbed my tray. "You wanna go grab Travis or do you want me to?" She shook her head.

"No. Let them cool off a bit. He seemed pretty upset when they left. Let them calm each other down." I nodded, smiling softly.

"They really are a great couple." She nodded, staring off in the distance. "Always there for each other. Never apart, yet they can survive completely on their own," she whispered, as if to herself. "We could learn a thing or two from them." The bell rang and we had to head off to class, going in two different directions. I waved to her.

"Bye, Fae. I'll see you around, alright?" She nodded, her eyes shining like stars.

"Yeah, I'll see you later. I promise." I smiled to myself, walking until she was out of sight.

Our problems were solved, yet the world kept turning.


	5. Quatre

Worlds are capable of crashing in an instant.

When I was in middle school, Allen had to travel outside of the country. He was a freelance... something and worked for a company based in the states. He seldom travelled for work. But when he did, he took weeks at a time to come home. My other brothers took similar trips to their home countries, but shorter and more frequent.

The days were long as I excitedly waited for him to come home and bring me presents. I was going to pester him about seeing his imaginary girlfriend. He would probably shove me or just put me in a headlock for saying something like that. But then he'd tell me about all the amazing things in New York.

Then Oliver got a phone call.

A car crash, he said. Not just a fender bender, either. Allen was in critical condition in a hospital in N.Y.C.

Oliver and François went immediately to go see him. Matt stayed with me, trying to keep himself from freaking out.

Okay, so maybe I was the one freaking out.

"Please can we go see him? It'll just be a weekend trip?"

"Maelynn." The full name. "You don't even have a passport. There's no way you could get to the border much less to the U.S."

"What if he's dying? What if he doesn't come back? What if-"

"He's not going to die, Lynn."

"I can't promise that he might not come back for a while, but he won't die." His voice went low, as if speaking to himself. "He can't just die on us."

A month of slow anguish passed. Allen has to stay in the E.R. for weeks, and he came back to Canada with a broken arm and bandaged ribs. He healed in no time, but for a while I thought I lost him forever.

* * *

It had been three weeks since Fae and I made up. We were still awkward towards one another, but the situation was a lot better. The guys finally forgave me for my addiction, and I just got a raise at Mr. Taylor's. Things were finally looking good for me.

For the first time in about a month, I finally got to ride my bike back home. It was a good feeling save for the shaking in my hands and the queasy feeling in my stomach. Ah, withdrawal symptoms are always a bitch. At that point, I finally understood why rehab institutes existed. I almost felt like starting up again just to get this feeling to stop. Almost.

The first week of recovery was hell. I barely slept, constantly woken by nausea and fear. I was sweating and hyperaware of every sense and symptom. That, coupled with the insatiable desire for relief, made life a living nightmare.

The second week of recovery was hell, but less so.

It was hard, but I felt proud of myself. I only drank one bottle of liquor and a single over the span of the month, and it felt good. Okay, it felt absolutely horrible. I almost always felt like I was going to pass out or throw up or break down or a mixture of the three, but I was willing to put up with it.

Though, I finally realized that I didn't want to become the druggie living in a crack house and always asking people for money. I was too proud of a person to live like that. I had goals in my life, and I wasn't going to let drugs get in the way of them, no matter how good they felt.

I couldn't tell something was wrong until I walked into the house. The exterior was just as clean and pristine as it always was. My body froze as I saw the living room. It seemed chaos reigned. Papers were strewn everywhere. All of the cabinets were turned over and the drawers were on the floor, broken. The couch pillows were torn open as if someone took a knife to them.

I should have left then and there, but like an idiot I kept going.

"Hello?" I said without thinking. There was rustling upstairs, and my body went cold. Oh shit, that was a mistake. My mind went in slow motion, trying to think of what to do.

My eyes glanced to the knife block, and I grabbed a kitchen knife. The only exits to the house was on the far left side and the front entrance. Standing on the right of the house, I had cornered myself.

There are a few moments in time that stick in your head forever. The image of the gun to my face was one of them.

A man neared me, his expression livid. Dressed in black, nothing covered his face.

I extended the weapon. 

"Drop the knife," he said in English. I froze. "I said drop the damn knife!" It clanked to the ground. He pointed to the pantry. "Now get in and stay there." 

I did as he said, body shaking. Tears welled, and it was hard to walk.

An eternity passed sitting in that closet. Shots rang, but I stood still. There were no screams, no voices. Just the sound of raining bullets pierced my ears.

I waited.

And waited.

And waited.

And then the door opened, and I screamed.

"Oh, thank God. It's you!”

"Matt?" He covered my mouth, quickly silencing my cries.

“Shut up. We don’t have much time.” I nodded, and he removed his hand.

“Where are the others? Allen, Oliver, François?” He tried to smile, his grin coming out as a grimace.

“They’re alright. I promise.” I sighed. “But we have to get out of here. Before they come back.”

“But who are ‘they?’” 

“Dangerous people, Lynn. Really bad and really dangerous.” 

“Yeah, I got that but-” Voices could be heard in the other room. We stood, still as death.

Silently, Matt motioned for me to stand. I did so, legs like lead.

 _‘Come on,’_ he mouthed, making his way across the kitchen. As if in a dream, I followed.

An eternity passed on the way to the front door. The only entrance. And thus the only exit.

The silence was deafening.

At least until the sound of shouting blinded me.

Suddenly, I was shoved towards the door. I stumbled, using the handle to keep me from falling.

“Go! Run! He’s waiting for you outside!”

“Who?!” My heart wished to leap out of my chest. My eyes wished to drown themselves. My body wished to take root in that single spot. But he pushed me again, and my senses came back to me.

I ran. 

Out the door. Out the house, I ran. And there he stood, waiting for me.

Matthew.

His expression was pained.

“Lynn, come on.” He grabbed my arm, and I reared backwards.

“What are you doing here?”

“Matt,” was his sole reply. His motions were jerky, his body quivering. “He told me to get you out of here, Lynn. Before they catch us."

"Wait!" I turned around, looking at the house. "What about the others?"

As if fate wished it, the door opened. Matt stood there. Shakily, he smiled as if everything was alright.

And then they grabbed him. I screamed.

"Maelynn, go!" Matt, yelled from the house, held back by two men. "Go with Matthew! Get out of here!"

“No! I can’t just-”

"Go!" The door slammed. I looked to the van, feeling like I was glued into place. 

My body moved without my permission. 

Matthew ran to the driver’s seat. I climbed in as fast as I could, not even bothering to put on a seatbelt.

The last thing I heard before closing the door was a single gun shot.

"Where are we going?" I asked, the car already accelerating at a dangerous rate. The house faded from view. Another car, white with the windows tinted black, raced towards us. It was them. It had to be them.

Whoever ‘they’ were.

"The airport. We've got to get out of the country, but first we've got to lose them. Hold on." He made a violent u-turn, and I grabbed onto the handle for support.

"Mattie! Slow down, we're gonna crash!"

Everything happened so fast. Too fast for me to comprehend.

Something rammed into the side of the car, and the ground went flying from below. Someone screamed. I thought it was me, but I wasn't sure. A sharp pain stabbed my head as a was rammed into the door. Stars burst behind my eyes, and someone called my name as the world faded to black.


	6. Cinq

A stabbing pain woke me, and for a minute I forgot who I was. Then, the world seemed to crash down, and I tears came to my eyes.

Confusion and fear reigned, and I wondered what happened to my family. Were they the ones targeted or were they just in the crossfire? We knew some shady people, and organized crime wasn't a foreign concept in our house. Just who exactly did they piss off?

I looked around, realizing I was on a plane. It was a very nice one, and it seemed more like a private jet than, say, Air Canada. I was lying down on a pullout bed, and I slowly sat up, clutching my head.

I was in a haze, thinking about nothing as time seemed to slip away from me. I could've sat there for a few minutes or a few hours. But one minute I was alone and the next there was someone else in the room. Something was on my forehead. His hand were icy cold, and I shivered.

"You're awake," Matthew grimaced. "How do you feel?"

"Like I got hit by a truck," I tried to say, but all that came out was a low wheeze. I coughed, my throat dry. He stepped away and brought me water. I took it, and it felt like peppermint against my burning throat.

"Thanks," I muttered. I put my hand to my head, skull pounding. I felt bandages on my forehead.  
"I checked your head right after we left. You have a bit of bruising and a mild concussion." I winced.

"Definitely feels like I have a mild concussion. Anything else?" My speech was slowed, and the world was tilting.

"No. Luckily, it doesn't look like there's any permanent damage. You should be fine after a couple of days of rest. It could've been a lot worse." I nodded slightly.

"What happened? Who were those people? They talked about - something, what was it - foreign countries. The way they spoke, it sounded like they were talking about someone. People." He stayed silent, avoiding my eyes. I narrowed my eyes.

"Mattie," he flinched. Even in my weak state, he seemed to fear me. "What do you know about all of this?"

"I mean," he stuttered, his face going pale. He sighed, giving me a sideways glance. "Look, what happened, well, you might not believe me." I folded my arms, head pulsing.

"I might. You'll never know unless you tell me. But I live with four brothers, and I know how to make someone give me what I want." He held his hands up disarmingly.

"Okay. But just try to keep an open mind okay?" And so he told me everything. At first I didn't believe him. I mean, who would? It sounded pretty crazy, and even after he explained it, I didn't really understand everything he said. And the concussion most certainly wasn't making anything better. I had known him for about a month, so I didn't trust him fully yet.

"So, wait. Let me just get this straight. You're saying there are immortal personifications of countries and that you're one of them." He nodded.

"And that there are two kinds of personifications. 1P and 2P."

"Yeah."

"And you and Matt are both simultaneously the personification of Canada. Oliver is Great Britain, Allen is the U.S and François is France."

"Exactly." It was silent for a few minutes as I thought everything over, and then I sighed.

"That has got to be the lamest thing I have ever heard." His eyes widened, and he began to stutter.

"So you don't believe me?" I shook my head, writing my hands.

"Oh I believe you. I don't know why, but I feel like you're telling the truth." I looked out the window, watching the clouds. I had never been on a plane before, and the view was much better than I thought. Looking down at those small trees the size of a rice grain, I realized how small people really are. "I can't explain it. It's just deep down I know. I just know." I looked to him, and his mouth was wide open. "Does that sound crazy to you?"

He quickly closed his mouth with a clack, his face trying to go back to normal. "No. No it-" He stopped himself. "Yeah. A little bit. But, I don't know. You've never heard any of the 2Ps talk about this before?"

"No." I thought for a moment. Maybe I had heard about this whole Nations situation before. It sounded oddly familiar, but I wasn't sure why. Maybe that blow to the head was the last straw and I finally went crazy. That seemed a lot more likely than anything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours. "But I still don't understand what exactly the terrorist group... what was it called again?"

"The Anti League," he said. "It's really complicated, but the Anti League is basically a group that thinks the world would be better without Personifications. They usually go after small territories, though I don't remember them ever going after such large countries." He looked to me. "Even among Nations, Lynn, your brothers are pretty important. I've never seen any civilian group go after such powerful Representatives." He stayed silent. I shook my head, and a pain pierced my skull. I cried out.

"Careful! You're pretty shaken up. You might want to take it easy until we get to our stop." I winced.

"Yeah. Where are we going?"

"I can't tell you." I glared through the pain. "Look, there's been a security breach, and everywhere right now is compromised. If I say anything, a surveillance system might pick it up. Trust me it's for your own safety."

"Fine," I muttered knowing there was nothing I could do about it. "Now go away. And turn of the light while you're at it. I'm going to at least try to get some sleep."

The plane ride lasted for about three hours. At least, that's what Mattie told me. I was in a fitful limbo of consciousness and oblivion, and Mattie had to shake me awake as we were landing.

"Now remember, Lynn," he said, keeping his voice low. "We have to move quickly. The Anti League probably isn't here-"

"Probably isn't here?" I said, narrowing my eyes. Even dim light felt like piercing flames in my head. "What happens if they followed us?" He grimaced, avoiding my eyes.

"This is a top secret government airport, and we have all kinds of signal blocks in the air. There isn't really a chance that they followed us. But remember, we have to move fast. I have a friend that's going to pick us up in his plane and take us to a more secure location." I raised a brow.

"Who is it?" He rubbed his neck.

"Um, he's actually kind of like my brother, but not really. His name is Alfred and he's the personification of the United States." My face went pale, and my breath quickened.

"We crossed the border." It wasn't a question. He nodded, seemingly lost in thought.

"About an hour ago. We're in Maine right now. At the northeastern point of the country. It was the closest and most secluded base in the area. Alfred flew in from D.C to come meet us." My eyes widened.

"Wait, so that's the friend who you were talking about when we first met? The one that lives in D.C?" He gave me a confused look and tilted his head sideways.

"Um, I mean, yeah," his voice went soft, as if speaking to himself. "I can't believe you remembered that, actually." I thought for a while, watching the clouds part through the plane's wings.

"So are all of your friends Nations, then?" He shrugged.

"Well, usually the personifications usually only talk with their top politicians and officers and other Nations and Provinces. It wasn't always like that, but ever since..."He sighed, as if re-living a painful memory. He shook his head. "We try to keep our distance from humans."

"Why?" He shook his head.

"We're immortal, or really close to it. We live for hundreds of years, a lot longer than any human lifespan. We've all done it at some point. Gotten close to a human, I mean. When they die, we go into a heavy depression and mourn for decades or even centuries at a time. We know that we'll outlive every human we meet. Even the youngest baby will eventually die before us. So we don't really bother anymore."

"That's," I swallowed a lump in my throat. "That's pretty intense." He nodded solemnly. "How could you possibly live like that? I could never..." my voice faded. Thinking of all my friends dying before me and having to live hundreds of years longer than them, the idea seemed absolutely crazy. "It sounds so lonely." He shrugged.

"Sometimes. But you learn to live with it. After a century or two, you finally accept the fact that you're immortal." I could tell he wanted to drop the subject, so I asked him a different question, but it didn't feel any less painful.

"What's going to happen to my brothers? They're still back home." I shook my head. "Are they going to be okay? Can I call them so they know I'm safe?" His lip twitched, and he frowned.

"I'm not sure. We're still a bit worried about wiretapping and security, so I don't know. But Matt knows where you are. He had a suspicion that something like this might happen, so he entrusted me with you if anything bad were to happen."

"When can I call them?" He winced as I took his arm, and I saw that he was injured, as well.

"I'm not really sure, but we'll have better security at the new location. Those places are specifically designed for situations just like this." I nodded. My ears began to pop, and I felt a slight pressure in my head. I looked out the window, seeing a wide expanse of trees and a small dot of open land. In a vast expanse of wilderness, a few specks of roads and buildings stood. I guessed that's where we were heading.

The landing was a little nauseating especially with the slight turbulence. Mattie said that this was normal for first-time fliers, but it didn't help settle the queasiness in my stomach.

When we landed, Mattie took my hand in his, leading me off the plane. I stumbled once, the world spinning. He tried to help, but I put out a hand to stop him. I could do a simple task like walking. A man in a black pilot suit bowed to us, and I nodded back. The landing site was pretty bare. It just had a few military trucks driving around and a few stationary, military grade planes. A man in what I assumed was a U.S air force uniform escorted us to a small building about the size of a barn.

The inside of the building looked like an apocalyptic storehouse with all kinds of weapons and military vehicles. Dozens of soldiers rushed around frantically. The man led down a flight of stairs into some sort of basement. It actually seemed like a prison or a top secret holding cell, because all of the doors were a thick metal, and the escort had to put in a long code into a keypad to open each door.

After five minutes of walking and losing all sense of direction we finally made it to a small room that looked more like a company lounge than a military base. Inside were three people two of who I assumed were bodyguards by the quantity of their weapons, and a guy who looked like the son of an important politician.

As soon as we opened the door, the third man turned to us, giving a wide smile. He rushed over to Mattie, quickly embracing him into a large, and seemingly painful, hug. Mattie let out a squeak of protest.

"Yo, Can-Can! Glad you could make it in one piece." Mattie's face paled.

"America," he wheezed. "I can't breathe." The man quickly let go, and Mattie's shoulders slumped dramatically.

"You okay, Mattie?" I whispered. He nodded, gulping for air. He let out a weak smile.

"I should've expected that, honestly. Every time I visit him, this always happens." The man suddenly noticed me, and he gave a smile.

"Sorry about that. It's just kind of my way of greeting my bro." He held out a hand. "I'm Alfred F. Jones, Representative of the United States of America. Nice to meet you." I looked to Mattie for reassurance, and he nodded. I slowly took his hand, noticing his strong grip.

"I'm Maelynn Bonnefoy. But just call me Lynn." He nodded, his grin widening.

"Canada's told me a lot about you." His eyes widened, and he laughed sheepishly. "Sorry. I mean Matthew. I know getting used to Personification names can be confusing sometimes." I shrugged, trying not to stare at the bodyguards.

"The names are the least confusing part," I mumbled.

"Well that's good," his smile faded, tone going serious. "And I'm sorry all of this is happening to you." He shook his head, grimacing. "We Nations try to keep our citizens out of these kinds of threats. All of us are going to try to help you through this. We're so sorry that you got caught in the middle of this fight." I shrugged pretending not to care. It was all bravado.

"Well, nothing I can do about it, really." I ran a hand through my hair absentmindedly. "So where exactly are we heading? Mattie said that it was some sort of secret base, but he never said where." Alfred's expression changed, and he seemed nervous.

"Um, I can't really tell you yet." He lowered his voice as if telling a secret. "We can never be one hundred percent sure that the information won't get passed along somehow. When we get to the location and double check to make sure there are no wiretaps, I'll be glad to tell you. But until then, sorry."

"That's fine. Mattie said the same thing about this base." I ran my fingers through my hair. "I understand." He looked back to the bodyguards.

"Is everything set up yet?" The two gave curt nods, and Alfred turned back to us. He smiled widely.

"Alright then. Let's go." Alfred lead the way, the two guards walking on either side of him. I gave Mattie a nervous glance, and he whispered to me.

"The secret service's just a precaution. Some of the larger Nations like to have a bit of extra protection. Due to all of the terrorist attacks and threats to the U.S, the leaders suggested that Alfred have security with him at all times."

"They can force him to do that? The leaders, I mean?" He shrugged.

"Sort of. Really, it's more of a suggestion, and Alfred thinks is a good idea to have more security. And he's not wrong. Sometimes it's better for us to have a little bit of extra protection. This isn't the first time one of us has been targeted by radical and foreign nationalist groups."

"That's insane." He shrugged, looking around hesitantly.

"You get used to it after a while." He thought for a moment. "Actually, you're kind of raised from the beginning extremely protected. We really don't know anything else, so it all seems kind of normal to us."

We made it to a small, black plane that looked more like a private jet. Well, in all likelihood it probably was. It was definitely the nicest plane in the entire field. Alfred stopped right before the stairs up to the plane.

"You two go on ahead. I have to talk with the guys for a moment." We nodded walking into the plane. It seemed just as nice as the last plane with leather seats and a few flat screen TVs and a pullout bed.

After a couple minutes, Alfred joined us on the plane without his escorts. He rubbed his neck, and he looked like he hasn't slept in a while. With this situation, I didn't blame him.

"Sorry about that, guys. Just had to check on something first." He checked his watch. "The plane ride should last about an hour. We'll get to the safe house at around 6 o'clock. We've got a bit of time to kill."

"Ok," Mattie turned to me. "Lynn, if you want to go get some more rest there's a pullout bed in the back."

"We've also got some food in the fridge and a microwave if you want some." I nodded.

"I think that's a good idea. We should both have something to eat. Save our strength." We had some instant dinners. They weren't actually that bad. Then again, it seemed like everything these Representatives had were high quality things, even their pre-prepared foods.

"So, Lynn, isn't it?" I nodded. "You're from Ontario, aren't you?"

"Yeah, Toronto. But I've been living in Montréal for the past five years."

"So you can speak both English and French."

"Yup. I already knew it when the guys adopted me. Allen uses English all the time in the house." His eyes widened, and his face seemed to pale a bit.

"Allen? You mean 2P America?" He looked to Mattie, and he nodded solemnly. "Canada told me about Matt - his counterpart - but," his voice went low. "I didn't realize there were others. Who else has been taking care of you?"

"Um, it's just Matt, François, Oliver, and Allen. Why?" He lowered his head, his hair hiding his eyes. He muttered something under his breath, and when he looked at me again, he seemed like he was trying to hide anger, but as to why I didn't know. He turned to Mattie.

"You didn't tell her, did you?" He sighed, shaking his head.

"I really didn't see a need to. It's not like we can change the past. What's done is done." His hands clenched into fists.

"Damn. I never expected them to break the rule. Not so soon." I looked to both of them, raising a brow.

"What rule? What are you talking about?" They refused to look at me. "What rule?" I said more harshly. "Tell me." They flinched. Mattie was the first to speak up.

"Do you remember how I told you the Personifications don't usually interact with humans much outside of work?" I nodded. "Well, you already know the reason for that. But all of us have agreed on certain rules with dealing with humans. One of the rules is that we're not allowed to take in orphaned children to raise. We get really attached to them and, well-"

"When they die, you still live on." My mouth went dry.

"Not just that," he sighed, running a hand through his hair. "They're constantly in danger because of us. The people who know about our existence know that we're immortal. They can't threaten to kill us. But human children," his voice gave out. It looked like he was about to cry. "Let's just say that our enemies try to use the child's mortality against us."

"They threaten you with the kid's life." He nodded, not looking at me. "So, does that mean I wasn't supposed to happen? I was adopted by four Nations, so that means all of them were breaking that rule because of me?"

"Lynn," Mattie said. He placed a hand on my shoulder.  "None of this is your fault. You were just a child, and you're," he swallowed. "You're human. You were a child, so you didn't know. Don't feel guilty about any of this. They were the ones who did this, not you." I felt my hands shake, and I clenched them into fists.

"It's not that," I gritted my teeth. "I mean, it is. But they knew that I would be targeted because I'm human. They knew this kind of thing would happen eventually. And by adopting me, they put me in danger." I slammed my eyes shut. "I'm not even mad about them lying to me. It's an important secret, I get that. But all this time," I growled. "This is their fault. The Anti League, the house attack, everything. If they had just followed the stupid rule, I wouldn't be in this situation. This is all their fault." It was silent besides the engine running. America put his hand on my shoulder.

"Hey, dude. Maelynn I-" I stood up quickly.

"Don't call me that. Don't call me that name," I glared. "Don't talk to me. Let me be. Just leave me alone." I ran to the back room and locked myself in the makeshift bedroom. I sank to the floor, putting my head in my hands. I swallowed a lump in my throat and felt my eyes burn. No. I wasn't going to cry. Not today. Not now. But I couldn't stop the tears from coming, and I tried to keep my sobs quiet.

I was so scared. I was scared of what was waiting for us in the states. I was scared for my brothers. Mad as I was, I still cared about their safety.

A pit began to form in my stomach. What if those guys found me? The terrorist group seemed pretty hardcore. If they found me, I had no doubts that they would torture me for information. I knew nothing, but that wouldn't stop them. They would use me as bait or a hostage, or worse. They would torture me to death, and I could do nothing about it.

My body began to shake, and I curled myself deeper into a ball. I clutched onto my head, desperately trying to stop the growing panic in my chest. It wasn't working.

At that point, I was glad for the lack of sleep. After about an hour, my body felt too tired to continue my panic attack. Slowly, I cried myself to sleep, wondering if I would ever see my family again.


	7. Six

Martin Laurent. The name will forever live in infamy.

I met him during my sophomore summer when the air was crisp and the days were long. It was a promising time as I had just received a promotion from Mr. Taylor and was making a lucrative $10 an hour.

Times were good.

There many regulars at the café. Most of them middle-aged, a few college students. They treated me well, always. There was this one boy, about my age or a little younger, who came often.

He would always smile at me, making small conversation. I would make jokes, and he would laugh. He would tell me about his life, and I would listen.

I should have told her.

He mentioned more than once that he was single. Just out of a relationship, he said. He would make comments, saying I was funny and smart and beautiful. I thought they were just compliments. Something friends said.

I should have told her.

He asked me to go to a football game with him. I said yes out of courtesy. It wasn't a date, I told myself. But he thought different. And he acted accordingly.

I should have told her. But I didn't.

* * *

It took a while for Mattie to wake me.

"Come on, Lynn. We've landed." I groaned.

"Where are we?" He helped me stand. My head still hurt, but less so. I guessed the best medicine really was sleep.

"A private airport just outside of Richmond, Virginia. Middle of the east coast."

"Are we staying there, then?" He shook his head.

"No. Alfred's got a safe house in the state though. This is the closest and most secure airport in the area. Alfred hasn't told me much yet, but he says he'll tell us the plan when we get to the safe house."

"What plan?" He ran a hand through his hair. In that moment, he looked old. I saw a few wrinkles on his forehead that I didn't notice before.

"Lynn, what we're going through right now is an international emergency. The house of four Personifications was just attacked-"

"And they were caught taking care of a human girl." I added. He grimaced, not meeting my eyes.

"Yeah, that too." He muttered. "But what's been happening is huge. I think we might have to hold an emergency U.N.R for this." I raised a brow. 

"What's a U.N.R?"

"United Nations of Representatives. Basically, it's like the U.N but just with the Personifications. No bosses - er, prime ministers or anyone like that. We don't hold them often, but when something like this happens, we're kind of forced to." I stayed silent, trying to process all of the information, and I felt my body go cold.

"Does that mean you'll leave me alone to goin the meeting?" He saw my expression and shook his head rapidly.

"No, no! We wouldn't do that. We would never just leave you alone." He thought for a moment. "In fact, I hate to say this, but the other Nations would probably like to hear a bit from you. Your side of the story and everything." I gulped, and he gave a reassuring smile. "But you don't have to worry about that right now. Let's just get America and head out to the safe house. We'll feel better there." Alfred met us outside, an unmarked car ready for us. He gave a large grin.

"Hey, dudes. The car's ready whenever you are. It's just us three from here on out." Mattie looked to me.

"You okay?" No. I wasn't. But he already knew the answer, so I nodded wordlessly.

"Alright then. Let's get going, America." Mattie and I both sat in the back seat - he didn't want me to sit alone, he said - while Alfred drove. Apparently, the guy knew the route by heart. And the car ride was anything but quiet.

Seriously, America did not know how to shut up.

"So Montréal, huh? Sounds really cold. Does it snow there often?" He pronounced the city name with a distinct American accent. I snorted.

"Is that seriously your way of saying 'how's the weather?'" He gave me a strong laugh.

"Yeah, that kind of was a lame conversation starter. Hmm, let me think of something better." His facial expressions were larger than life. "Oh. Have you ever been to the U.S before?" I shook my head.

"No." I've lived in seven different provinces, but I've never been outside of Canada."

"Not even for a vacation?"

"No. My brothers never wanted me to leave the country. They said it was too dangerous for me. Now I know why." I sighed, running a hand through my hair. "They were always travelling, though. Each of them always had a passport ready. Sometimes they would be gone for five or six months at a time. The only person who was always at home was Matt." I gave a wry smile. "I guess they got sick of staying away from their native country for too long. Probably had a lot of work to do, being a Personification and all." I guess I decided to be chatty, having nothing better to do. I quickly changed the subject. "So I assume the both of you travel a lot. For business and stuff, right?"

"Yeah," Alfred said. "We've both seen some pretty cool places. London, Paris, Beijing. You name it, we've probably been there at least once." I decided to play his little game, feeling the corners of my lips turn up.

"Tokyo?"

"We went just last month for the emperor's birthday. He's a nice dude."

"Ok. What about Moscow?" Mattie spoke up.

"We both went to go see Ivan - the Personification of Russia - during Christmas. I know America's been more recently than that." He grimaced.

"Yeah. Things aren't the best right now, but we're trying to come to some sort of peace. It's definitely not as bad as it used to be."

"What about Québec? Have you ever been to Montréal?" He nodded.

"Oh yeah. Lots of times. I think the first was during - when was it, Can-Can - the Revolution?"

"I think it was earlier than that," he replied. "Britain and you went to the province just after the Battle of Québec."

"Oh yeah. When was that, '59? God, it feels just like yesterday, in a way." He shook his head, his eyes going glossy. He smiled, eyes looking off in the distance. "Some things you just never forget." He seemed to focus again, pulled out of his memories. "But yeah. I really like Montréal. Québéc City is really nice too." He gave a large grin. "But I have to tell you, nothing beats the good old U.S of A. No, sir. I'll stick with the fifty states any day." I gave a warm smile.

He just seemed to light up when talking about his country. I supposed that was natural, considering it was, in fact, his country. I could tell Mattie felt the same way about my home country. They always looked like proud fathers when they talked about their country. I tried to remember if I had ever seen any of my brothers look like that before. All I could think of was when Matt looked at me sometimes when I did well on a test or made a fantastic dish. Out of all of my brothers, I was definitely the closest with him.

The conversation kept going after that. I found out I liked America more than I originally thought. He wasn't half bad despite his loud personality. After a while though, even he got tired of talking and we drove in comfortable silence.

"We're here," America said as we pulled into a locked driveway. The house was a lot smaller than I thought. It was a classic American ranch style with light shingles and even a white picket fence. I laughed a bit at the cliché.

The inside was much more impressive than the exterior. It honestly looked like it was out of a Southern Living magazine with its pastel pillows and blue furniture. Every single piece of electronic seemed to be the newest model, and I almost fainted when I saw the kitchen.

"Holy shit." I looked over the appliances, trying to keep my mouth from hanging open.

"You like it?" America had a proud look on his face. I nodded, smiling widely. I could barely speak.

"You have everything. A complete set of culinary kitchen knives, a state of the art electric stove, a beautiful dishwasher and sink. Even - God is that a brick oven?" I inspected all of the appliances, marveling at their quality. "This kitchen must have cost a fortune!" He shrugged as if it was no big deal.

"Yeah. Had to spend a pretty penny on this stuff, but it was definitely worth it." He looked at me quizzically, trying to suppress a smile. "How do you know so much about kitchen stuff?" I heard Mattie laugh from the other room.

"You have no idea. Cooking is her passion. No, more like her obsession." I rolled my eyes at him, playfully shoving his shoulder. He blushed at the action, smiling slightly.

"Really? That's so cool. Do you wanna be a chef or something?" I nodded, cheeks ablaze, and I couldn't help but smile.

"Yeah. I was planning on applying to a few culinary schools in France and the U.S. I've worked at this one café for a few years to try to get some experience."

"Well, we don't actually have any real food right now. Just a couple of emergency non-perishables." His voice went low, as if talking to himself. "We'll probably need to get some when we go in town tomorrow."

"We're going to Richmond?" He gave a wide smile, putting his hands on his hips. In that pose, he looked like a comic book hero.

"Oh no. We're going to somewhere far better than that." He put on an overly enthusiastic announcer voice. "Founded July 16, 1790 and named after the first president of the United States with a population of over half a million people, it's a metropolis center envied by the entire world. Get ready for the trip of a lifetime. We're going to Washington D.C!" My eye twitched, and I face palmed.

"Did you seriously have that entire speech prepared already?" His face went red, and he rubbed the back of his neck.

"Um, maybe?" I just shook my head while Mattie gave an exasperated sigh.

"He's been giving that same monologue for the past two hundred years." He groaned. "America never changes." Alfred dropped the act, but he was still smiling.

"But yeah. So, I know I already told you, Matthew. But I just wanted to say that tomorrow we're having an emergency U.N.R meeting in the city. Did Mattie tell you what that was already?" I nodded.

"Yeah. He said it's where all of the Personifications have a U.N meeting." America nodded. "But will I have to go to the meeting, too?" He sighed.

"Yeah. I've talked with a few advisors, and I think you're needed at the meeting. Of course, I'm not going to make you go. I know how terrifying those meetings are to regular humans. It's your decision if you want to." I thought for a moment.

"What will I have to do? What do I have to say?"

"Basically tell what happened at the break-in. Tell us if there were any suspicious people you noticed before the attack. Maybe, if you feel comfortable, talk about what life was like living with the four Personifications."

My breath stopped. I was so distracted that I forgot. I was on the run and I forgot about it. I felt ashamed. I wanted to throw up.

How long had I been away? Not even twenty-four hours and I was already breaking down. Travis was probably worried sick. Fae probably thought I skipped town. Even if I could call them, what would I say? That I got caught up in some sort of weird international terrorist catastrophe? Even they wouldn't believe me.

I needed someone. Someone to tell me everything was okay. But no one was there. I was alone yet not. Life was rising like the sea, and I didn't know how to swim.

"Mattie? Where's the guest room? I'm gonna go lie down." He turned to me, quickly helping me. America saw expression. How couldn't he? I probably looked a mess. Bruised and battered, taken from my home. I'd slept maybe four hours in the past day, and I was still suffering from mild withdrawals.

"Let me take you there." I was in a weird dreamlike state at that point where he led me through a door. I couldn't see anything except that bed which promised the oblivion of sleep.

I didn't let the tears spill until he left the room.


	8. Sept

We had to switch cars halfway to the city. Something about needing extra protection in an 'international setting.' There were three guards in the car with us: two for America and one for Mattie. They basically ignored me, not even giving me a sideways glance. I guess they were used to other people hanging around the Personifications. Maybe there was some kind of etiquette rule they had to follow, and they weren't allowed to talk unless spoken to. I would have to ask America and Mattie about it later.

I took in the scenery, trying to keep my mind off the impending meeting. The traffic was terrible and, for a big city, all of the buildings were really small. There were monuments at every corner, and there seemed to be protesters on every other street. The city was probably more lively than I made it out to be, but I was too preoccupied with my own thoughts to notice.

The car dropped us off in front of a large, marble building. I didn't know much about American history, but I assumed it was important by how well kept it was.

"Now remember," Mattie whispered to me. "Everyone here isn't quite used to humans sitting in on meetings. Except for bodyguards and attendants. A few Personifications might. . . stare at first, but they don't really have anything against you. They're just-"

"Not used to humans, especially ones who break their number one rule. I got it," I huffed. "Honestly, you're making me more nervous than I already am. Just shut up and make sure I don't look like a complete idiot." He nodded, trying to give a reassuring smile.

"You'll do fine. I believe in you." When he opened the door, I was met with a wall of sound. There must have been hundreds of people in the room, all dressed in suits and fancy wear. Quickly, I could tell who were the Personifications and who were the guards. There seemed to be about one guard for each Nation, and they all wore sunglasses.

Only a few people stared, and most of them were guards. But there were a few Nations who looked my way. A man with near white hair gave me a slight glance. Another with auburn hair looked me up and down, sneering slightly. A guy with a scraggly blonde beard widened his eyes then shook his head sadly at me, giving me a wavering smile. I was one of maybe a dozen women in the room. These Nations all smiled at me.

I am ashamed to say I did not smile back.

I let Mattie lead the way, but I stayed by his side. I never walked behind him, keeping my head high and face blank. I learned from Allen how to seem confident in a crowd, even if I didn't feel like it.

We sat in a circular table, Mattie at my right and America at my left. I felt extremely uncomfortable, especially considering that I was the only human at the table; all of the guards stood lined on the walls. My palms begin to sweat, and I tried to keep my face as neutral as possible. I couldn't show weakness, especially not now surrounded by powerful, near-immortal nations.

At that point, almost all of the Representatives were staring at me. A few were obviously trying to avoid my gaze. Some gave me a small, pitying smile while others looked at me like a bug underneath their foot. But most just gave me indifferent, business-like looks. America stood up, back straight and face expressionless.

"I call this emergency United Nations of Representatives meeting to order. The first item on the table: a terrorist group by the name of the 'Anti League' broke into the home of four nations: the counterparts of America, Great Britain, France, and Canada. This occurred on November 15 at around 1600 hours Eastern Standard Time in the city of Montréal, Québec. A human girl, legal name 'Maelynn Bonnefoy" The entire table turned to the blonde man from before. France, as his name tag said, merely shrugged. "-was found to have been legally adopted ten years ago by the Nations in question. She discovered the terrorists that day in her designated living quarters and has been taken into custody by the Republic of Canada for her own protection. Maelynn, would you please stand to identify yourself?"

My mouth went dry, and I felt my heart hammer in my chest. I looked up at America, wondering where the bubbly, air-headed blonde had gone. No, this wasn't Alfred anymore. This was the true Personification of the United States.

Mattie squeezed my hand reassuringly, nodding at me. I stood up quickly, trying to smooth out my skirt. Just stare at the wall, girl. Pretend like you aren't in a room with the most important people in the world. I gave a small nod of acknowledgement, sweeping my eyes across the room. I sat down before I could make a complete fool of myself. I gave a deep breath, trying to calm the buzzing feeling in my chest.

"If I may ask," A voice to my right rang out. He had a snobbish accent, as if he thought he was better than anyone else in the room. His nametag said 'Great Britain.' I wondered why they had nametags in the first place. Surely they knew each others' titles by now. My cheeks warmed as I realized they were probably for me. "Why is the human girl sitting at the Nation's table? Surely she should have a separate seat prepared for her, being the guest of honour at this meeting." They way he said that last part sounded like an insult. My eye twitched and my mouth moved before my brain could process what I was saying.

"The human girl has a name, good sir. I should suggest that you use it." I could tell that I messed up because all conversation stopped. I think I heard a few of the attendants gasp. Both Mattie and America cursed under their breaths.

"Mind your tone, young lady. You are seated with some of the most important people in the world. Please act like it." I couldn't tell why, but I felt very bold at that moment. Nation or not, no one was going to talk to me like that.

"Frankly I don't care much about that title. Don't disrespect me and I will treat you accordingly." Mattie sighed, putting his head in his hands.

"Why are you always like this?" America quickly butted in before either of us could say anything else.

"Canada and I are perfectly comfortable with Maelynn sitting by each of our sides. Being her temporary guardians, she has a right to be with us. Besides, we don't want 'our guest' to feel alienated from the discussion." I was surprised by the professionalism America held, even though he was visibly upset. He kept his tone level, only narrowing his eyes slightly at the opposite Nation.

"Now, if we could please discuss the problem at hand without further squabbling." I heard laughter around the entire table, but I didn't understand why, though I was glad that the tension disappeared slightly. "This terrorist group is not a new one. They first emerged during the 1950s but became a large problem in the early 2000s. They are an international group, but their main bases are primarily located in North America."

"What have we done in the past to address this problem?" a woman said. Mattie spoke up this time, his voice quiet but strong.

"We've relocated a few Personifications to more safe areas, usually within an ally's or neighboring country's borders. The group appears to be targeting small Nations, States, and Provinces. We've noticed that the Southeastern Asian countries and the North American States and Representatives are at particular risk, as well as a few Central American Nations." There was lots of mumbling, and the Asian and Latino Nations seemed agitated.

"What are we going to do to combat this group? Will we take offensive measures against them?" Someone said. 'Republic of China,' I read.

"And who says we need to fight? Perhaps we could talk this out diplomatically. We could come to some sort of peace agreement. What are their demands?" Britain said, seeming to have completely forgotten me.

"What does it matter?" China retorted. "It's clear that they want us wiped out. They are specifically targeting Personifications. For power or from spite, the cause does not matter. We need to deal with them swiftly and without mercy."

"If we deal with this problem without forethought or negotiations, this will only end in misunderstandings and unwanted bloodshed," the Personification of Germany said. For some reason, I shivered. Mattie didn't seem to notice, but America gave me a sideways glance.

This entire exchange was dizzying. Their conversation ran in circles, and they spoke too fast for me to understand.

"Are we just supposed to compromise? Who's to say their demands are too high? And if we don't stop them by force, then they will never end their terror. We must crush this group before they do any real harm. They've already attacked the home of four Nations. Who's to say one of us isn't next?" There was mumbling of agreement around the table until someone spoke up. Israel.

"Those were 2P Nations, though. Was it really such a bad thing that their house was taken?" I raised a brow.

"What does he mean by that?" I whispered. Mattie stiffened, his face going pale. He avoided my gaze, and I saw him share a worried glance with America. I knew they were hiding something from me. America finally spoke.

"We'll tell you later." My eye twitched, but the conversation around the table continued. Slovakia spoke up next.

"What does that matter, though? If the Anti League feels comfortable enough to attack the house of our counterparts, then we are next."

"But think about it," Norway said. "Our counterparts have been our near enemies, save for a few," he looked at Mattie and another man at the far end of the table. "For centuries, if not millennia, they have aided in our downfall. Civil Wars," America flinched. "Rebellion movements. They represent all that is evil within our borders."

"We have been having this conversation before," I could barely understand the thick accent to my right. He had near white hair, reminding me of snow. "There is nothing we can do. They are immortal; we cannot kill them. And if we hurt them, we hurt us."

"Easy for you to say, Russia." Britain muttered. "Your counterpart isn't completely insane." A few of them nodded in agreement.

"Is he talking about Oliver?" I whispered. Mattie sighed, nodding. "But he's not," I paused, running a hand through my hair. "Okay, so maybe he is a little crazy. But he's not really dangerous, is he?" Britain turned to me, narrowing his eyes. Suddenly, I felt like pissing him off wasn't the best first move.

"And what about you, Maelynn Bonnefoy? You've lived with them for a decade. Illegal adoption. Do you know your situation goes completely against our rules as Personifications?" I gritted my teeth.

"I've been told."

"And how old are you? Fifteen?"

"Seventeen," I tried not to glare at him, trying to keep my voice professional. I could tell I was failing my miserably.

"So were raised by the 2Ps. For how long?"

"Twelve years."

I see. And would you say that you are loyal to them?" I raised my head high, confident in my answer.

"Of course. They're my family. I would do anything for them." Apparently, that was the wrong thing to say. Chaos ensued, and everyone began shouting in languages I couldn't understand. A few people even began to throw things like notepads and pencils. My eye twitched. America laughed nervously. He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

"Yeah. It's always like this."

"What did I say?" America rubbed his neck, not meeting my eyes. "Alfred?" He didn't say anything for a while, then he sighed.

"Look, Lynn. What you don't quite understand yet is-"

"Enough!" A military-like voice screamed. I jumped, and everyone went silent. It was Germany that had spoken up, and he looked like he was about to punch someone. Even from far away, I could see a few veins bulging in his forehead. "We must settle this diplomatically. We are Nations. We need to act like it." He took a deep breath. "Now, I believe we should take a ten minute recess and discuss the topic of illegal adoption afterwards. You are all dismissed."

Well, that was fast. I looked at the clock. We had only been in the meeting for half an hour before all hell broke loose.

Immediately, all the Personifications got up and headed out the door. Mattie put his hand on my shoulder, looking completely worn out. He turned to America, shaking his head.

"America, I think we should tell her." He nodded.

"I know." I raised a brow, looking between the two.

"Tell me what?" Mattie pointed out the door.

"Come on. We only have ten minutes. I know a place we can go." America turned to me, a strange look on his face. "Lynn, there's still a lot of things you don't know. We tried to keep you in the dark to protect you, but I don't think that's possible anymore. Let's just talk about this in private." He tried to grab my hand, and I quickly pulled it away. I narrowed my eyes, stepping backwards in instinct.

"Don't touch me." I turned. "America what's going on?"

"Look. I'll explain everything. For real this time. But right now, I just need you to take my hand and trust me."

For a minute, all I could hear was the hammering in my chest. Blood rush through my ears, and my hand twitched. My breath quickened, and for some reason, his words seemed to trigger something in me, like a memory long forgotten.

Suddenly, I wasn't there anymore. I was looking at a different America in a different place. He was dressed in a bright, blue military suit, brown staining his uniform, holding his hand out to me.

"What?" Vision America gave me a sad smile, but also one filled with hope.

"I just need you to take my hand and trust me. Can you do that for me, please?"

My mind jerked, and I was back in the meeting room. America still held his hand out to me, the hopeful expression still on his face. I didn't know why, but I knew it was the right thing to do. Closing my eyes, I took his hand in mine, holding onto him tightly.

"Let's go."

* * *

"Okay, what's going on? What are you two talking about?" Mattie turned to America, and he raised his hands in surrender.

"What? I wasn't going to tell her. You're her country and all." Mattie gave him an, albeit pathetic, glare. Nevertheless, America sighed, rubbing his neck.

"Look, Lynn. Some of the Personifications don't really have the best relationship with their 2Ps. By nature, the 1Ps and 2Ps are almost always polar opposites. During Civil Wars, they often take opposite sides. Allen," he gulped, his voice lowering. "Well, he eventually became the Personification of the Confederates during the War Between the States." My mouth went dry.

"But he's from New York. Why would he ever-"

"We were different people back then, Lynn. He's changed a lot over the years." He shook his head. "But that's how it's been for millennia. Personifications of the same territory end up fighting with each other, trying to end the other and gain power. The first time, after all the treaties are signed, they usually make up and work with each other again. But after so many times of fighting, there are just some things that compromises and peace treaties can't heal. Do you get what I'm saying?"

"A bit. But you're still Nations of the same country. Don't you have to work together, or something?"

"Not necessarily. We tried doing that a while ago. It didn't work. There was too much fighting. Countries were torn in half and citizens were choosing sides. It wasn't pretty. Eventually we just agreed to leave each other alone. We wouldn't get in each other's way or try to fight. We just went our separate ways for the good of our countries. Some of us haven't made contact in decades."

I paused, letting it sink in.

"That's so fucking stupid." America gaped at me, his eyes bulging.

"Maelynn," Mattie whispered.

"No. It is. So what? You're just going to pretend like the 2Ps don't exist just because you've fought in the past? That's just running away from your problems." I rolled my eyes, hearing a bell go off in the ceiling speakers. "Come on. The meetings about to start."

Mattie and I just left America there to gape for a while until we eventually heard him running to catch up with us.

"So wait. You're not mad at us for not telling you?" My eye twitched.

"Oh I'm pissed. More than pissed." I heaved a sigh. "But right now, I've got other things to worry about." The Nations would question me about my past and about the 2Ps. They would try to pick apart everything about me. I could tell some of them already hated me just for being in the same room with them.

But I would have to forget all of that and stay strong. I set my jaw, eyes staring forward, pretending like I was ready to face the world. Because at that moment, I had no choice but to do just that.

* * *

"What is the full name that your adopted family gave you?"

"Maelynn Bonnefoy."

"Why did they give you that last name?" I shrugged, trying to calm the pounding in my ears.

"We live in a French province. It helps be blend in better, I guess."

"I see. And who were your guardians?" I rolled my eyes. We'd been over this at least a million times already.

"Matt Williams, Allen Jones, Oliver Kirkland, and François Bonnefoy."

"And how exactly did you fall into their care?"

"What do you mean? They adopted me."

"Yes, but where from? At what age? Do you remember anything about your biological family?"

"I was adopted in Toronto. At least that's what the papers say. They didn't know my exact age. I was about five or six years old, I think. And I don't remember anything about my birth parents."

"You remember nothing from before you were adopted?" I grimaced.

"Bits and pieces of it. A few hazy faces. A couple memories that never made sense to me. But nothing really concrete, no."

"Alright. And how did they treat you? The four men, I mean." I pursed my lips.

"Good. I mean, I guess they were like any other set of brothers. They used to tease me a lot, especially as a kid. Well, that was more Allen I guess. But they were good. Taught me how to cook, helped me prepare for my first day of high school, helped me find my first job. They," I felt a lump in my throat. I shut my eyes, putting my head in my hands. I took a deep breath, opening my eyes with a fiery passion. Luckily my tears didn't spill.

"I see. If you feel like any of this is too much for you, please tell us and we can call a recess." I shook my head, my lip twitching.

"No. I'm alright."

"Then if you'll allow it, I would like to ask a few more questions." I nodded. "You said you were adopted in Toronto but now live in Montreal. Are there any other places you have lived before?"

"Yes. We used to move around a lot. I remember we always had our suitcases packed, just in case we suddenly moved. We lived a lot in Nunavut for a while. Matt had a couple of cabins up there. After I was about ten, we moved down south to some of the bigger cities. Before, we kind of just lived in isolation. We moved to Montreal the summer before," I tried to remember. "Just before I turned thirteen."

"Did they tell you why they moved around so often?" I shook my head, narrowing my brows.

"No.They never told me. They were just like 'hey, we're leaving now,' and we left," My voice went low, thinking out loud. "For a while, it almost seemed like they were running from something. Or someone.

"I see. And can you describe the men that you lived with, please." I let out a huff of air.

"Well, Oliver was always cheery. He was never caught without a smile. I remember that he was the one that taught me how to cook from a young age. He was never outside the kitchen." I grimaced. "François, on the other hand, almost never came out of his room. He never talked much, except to cuss at us or order us around." I thought for a moment. He was actually the one who taught me how to smoke. "Allen and Matt were more like real brothers to me. Allen was always messing around with me. Teasing me about my hair or my clothes or my choice of friends. But he wasn't all bad. Just annoying. And Matt," I shook my head. "I was closer to him than anyone else in the world. He was always with me. Always making sure I was okay and cheering me up on a bad day. He and I were practically glued to the hip. We always had to deal with our three other idiot brothers, and we kind of bonded over it."

At that point, the tears had started up again, and I let them flow freely. I covered my mouth, trying not to sob. I didn't even notice that everyone in the room had gone quiet. I missed them so much. No matter how annoying or a pain in the ass they were to deal with, I loved them. And I couldn't bear knowing that I might not ever see them again.

By the time I had calmed down, I noticed that everyone was staring at me. My cheeks began to heat up, and I turned away from their gaze. Mattie and America just sat there wide eyed at me, and I thought I saw Mattie give me a pitying smile.

"I believe that's all we need to hear. Thank you, Maelynn for your words and your courage. Canada, would you please lead her out of the room while we reach a decision?" He nodded, taking my hand in his. I gave a last sweeping look across the table, trying to put on my most indifferent face. I turned to the door, keeping my head held high.

"That was really brave of you, Lynn."

"How so?"

"Not a lot of people could go stand up in a meeting full of two hundred and fifty nations and speak up for themselves like that. It took lots of guts." He chuckled. "Honestly, I think Britain was scared of you by the time you got through with him." My mouth dropped open.

"Really?" The high and mighty British Empire afraid of a human girl? Unbelievable.

"Oh yeah. To be honest, I wouldn't blame him. You looked pretty. . . amazing in there, to say the least. Like you could fight all of them to the death, all at once. With words or with brawns. It was incredible." My face flamed up.

"Thanks, I guess. I was just trying not to piss myself in there."

"You did better than that. A lot of them have definitely gained a lot of respect from you." He let me sit down in a private room. "I have to go. They're going to make a verdict soon."

"How long will that take?" He let out a long breath.

"Don't know. Sometimes it's a few minutes. Others, they can go on for hours. It really just depends. But America and I will come back for you right afterwards. I promise." I gave him a shaky smile, nodding.

"Thanks." He returned the gesture, silently closing the door on his way out. That gave me all the time in the world to think about everything that had just happened in the meeting room. Honestly, I just wanted to curl up on a couch and sleep. Or cry. Probably both was best.

So I decided to do just that. But I was pretty dried up after the meeting. I tried to let the tears come, but they never showed up. Heaving a large sigh, I just kept my eyes shut and waited for the world to fade to black.


	9. Huit

I had to stop Oliver from dressing me for my first day of eighth year. Uncle Flavio had dyed my hair tips blue a week ago, and  I showed it off in a messy bun. I looked amazing, if I did say so myself.

Oliver kissed me goodbye as I ran out the doorway. I tried to keep myself from blushing, heat already staining my face. I didn't want people seeing me as a little kid on the first day. I would have never lived it down.

Because it was Québec, we had an hour a day dedicated to French. It was stupid. The teacher asked us who was taught French as a baby, and six of us raised our hands. He had us sit at a table together. Then, he asked who took French in primary school, and all but three people raised their hands.

He began to talk about the class and what we would learn over the year. I began to tune him out, and so did most the people at my table. We rolled our eyes, sharing each other's pain.

"This is so stupid," a girl whispered to me in French. She had a clean, pink dyed pixie cut.

"I know, right? Why do we have to take this  stupid class?" I scoffed. She laughed, shaking her head.

"We could have it worse. I heard last year they had a Spanish class for people who already knew French." My eyes widened.

"Seriously? That's crazy. There can't be that many of us in one school," She gave me a weird look. Apparently, that was not the expected response.

"Where are you from?" Her French accent was slight and barely noticeable. Depending on which words she used, she could pass for a native English speaker.

"Toronto," I answered. She nodded her head in understanding.

"Yeah. A bunch of people here speak French. It's a French Province, after all." My cheeks heated in embarrassment, but she didn't seem to notice. "That's why my family moved here. My dad works at a bank and says all the clerks have to speak French."

"Weird."

"C'est la vie, as my dad likes to say. Better for us, I guess. What's your name?" My eyes darted away for a minute. That was always a sensitive topic. People used to tease me for my odd name, including my brothers at times.

"Maelynn. But I just use Lynn," I said a bit quickly. "You?"

"Fae." she sighed. I couldn't help but laugh.

"You're kidding. Your parents named you Fairy?" She face-palmed in exasperation, groaning.

"Ugh. I know, right? It's so stupid." Her cheeks began to match her hair. I shook my head.

"No. That's awesome. I wish I had a name like that. All I get is people failing to say my name right." She smiled, empathetic.

"Can't these Canadians learn how to read?" We laughed together. It was nice to have someone to relate to. There weren't a lot of French people in my old schools. Most were born in Canada and only knew English. I didn't care much, or at least I told myself I didn't, but I was glad I finally met someone who was like me.

"Mesdemoiselles!" The teacher was looking at us, seeming very upset. He had a nasally voice, one that I would have to hear throughout middle school. I used to joke that he dressed like a pimp.

"Oui?" We both said, looking at each other. We knew this couldn't be good.

"Would you like to share avec classe what was so funny?" We shared looks.

"No merci." We said too quickly. He gave us pointed looks.

"No merci, monseir," he corrected. He sighed.

"I will let both of you off with a warning since it is the first day. But please, try to pay attention in the future." He went back to explaining what we would be doing for the next two weeks.

"Oh my God," I sighed. "First day and I'm already in trouble. Won't Allen be proud." She gave me a knowing smirk. She was very pretty, I realized.

"I remember last year I got in trouble for putting a bug down this one boy's shirt." The way she said it, Fae sounded like she was bragging. Two could play at this game. I gave her a miscevious smile.

"That's nothing. I once got suspended for shoving an ant pile down someone's underwear." This seemed to take the cupcake. Her face morphed into disgust. She hugged herself protectively, shivering.

"Gross!" But she was still smiling, clearly impressed.

"Whatever. He was asking for it." In all honesty, I should've done worse. He said all my family belonged in prison and were just a bunch of crazy psychos. So I helped him lose three of his baby teeth. Hey, I was just trying to help.

We spent the rest of class talking about ourselves. She's been suspended four times and once put a boy in the hospital for a broken arm. She had an annoying brother who always tried to steal her stuff.

She was surprised to find out that I had four brothers who all took care of me. I shrugged it off. People usually had that reaction when they realized that I didn't live with my parents. No one ever realized I was adopted.

I knew no one else the first day. The other students avoided me, the reason eluding me. She was my sole lunchmate that day.

* * *

"Maelynn? Come on. They've made their decision." I sat up groggily, wiping the sleep from my eyes.

"What? Who?" Mattie lightly tugged on my arm, slowly lifting me to my feet.

"The U.N.R. Come on. You'll want to hear this." We jogged to the meeting room, and it looked exactly how I had left. Well, other than the fact that everyone looked exhausted, not just me.

"How long was I out?" I whispered.

"Not long. About forty-five minutes."

"Forty-five minutes?!"

"Shh." He lead me to our chairs, and the talking quickly started again.  
"Maelynn Bonnefoy, the meeting has reached a conclusion." Germany said. "Since you are almost of legal adult age, you will stay under the jurisdiction of the Republic of Canada until you finish your school career."

"What about my family?" His face remained neutral, void of any emotion.

"You are no longer to interact with the men Allen Jones, Oliver Kirkland, Matt Williams, and François Bonnefoy." Never see my brothers again. I would never go back to my old life. I didn't even feel the tears drip.

"We will contact them separately and tell them that you are now under our jurisdiction. Canada will give you further details outside." My body seemed to shut down. I couldn't feel anything. I couldn't think. I couldn't breathe. The terrible words just repeated in my head over and over again. Never see them again. Never see them again.

Never see them again.

"That's bullshit." My mouth moved before I could register what I was saying.

"Beg pardon?" There was no remorse for what I said. I didn't feel much of anything at that point.

"You heard me. That's bullshit. Why am I not allowed to see my family again?" He opened his mouth but I quickly cut him off. "I know it's against the rules. I get that. But just because you guys have some ancient rivalries and hatred against the 2Ps doesn't mean you just get to push your stupid feelings on everyone else. Why can't I ever talk to them again? There isn't any harm in me seeing them." Everyone gave me either shocked or downright horrified expressions. I rolled my eyes, just thinking about their stupid adoption rule. "Look, I promise not to tell anyone about your identity. That would hurt my family, too. And once I turn 18 I'll go off to college, an independent adult. But please. I have to see my family again." It was silent until Britain turned his attention to America, a confused look on his face.

"You never told her the truth, did you?" America's face went red, and I saw Mattie go pale.

"We told her as much as we could. We couldn't bear her knowing that-"

"So you didn't tell her?" I looked between the three men.

"Tell me what? America, what is he talking about?" He didn't answer. I turned to Mattie. "Mattie?" They said they would tell me something, but I didn't realize it was so serious. They stayed silent, and apparently that was too much for Britain.

"So you just left this girl in the dark? About who she's been living with for the past decade? You couldn't spare any decency, even on your own citizen." Mattie flinched. I glared at the two.

"What is he talking about? Tell me."

"Since those two wish to keep you in the dark, I suppose I should enlighten you." His tone was condescending, and I was growing to like him less and less. "The men you have been living with - the 2Ps -" he said the title like an insult. "Are, in fact, Personifications just like us. However, that is where the similarities end. We 1Ps are born of our people's cooperation, love and brotherhood. Created from the partnership and mutual trust of our citizens, we personify everything that is good in our country.

"However," his voice turned cold, as if he was telling a terrible horror story. "The 2Ps are just the opposite. They are born from our citizens, yes. But instead of being made from the good, they represent all of the evil within our borders. All of the prejudice, sin, and crime coagulate to form the 2Ps. And because of this, they become murderous. Insane. They are a danger to everyone, Personifications and humans alike. Each of your so called 'brothers' is a murderer of the innocent and as corrupt and cruel as the worst people in history."

It took a while for me to process his words, and then I started laughing. Not a healthy and joyous laugh. No, even I could tell it was just from stress and the utter ridiculousness of his words. The laugh scared even myself. I tried not to think too much about it, the pain in my chest tightening.

"You've got to be kidding. The guys as murderers? I know they're a little weird, and their rep sheet isn't perfect, but they're not that bad." My laughter died down, and I noticed that neither Mattie nor America looked at me. The rest of the Representatives gave me various shades of pitying looks. My nervous smile fell slowly.

"That can't be true. Right, Mattie? They're not murderers, or insane. It's not true. It just can't be." My voice went higher, going faster and faster. My heart beat in my ears, and my breathing became frantic.

"No. That's just wrong. They wouldn't hurt anyone." But even as I said it, I knew my words were false. My right hand twitched. "They never hurt me. They were good people. They are good people. They can't possibly-" I couldn't go on anymore, the lump in my throat stopping my words. The room was silent.

"Germany, the papers, please." Britain said softly. A few manila folders were placed in front of me, on each one a stereotypical red 'Top Secret' stamp. Hands shaking, I could barely get them open. When I did, I couldn't keep my eyes off of them.

In each folder was the information of my four brothers, and every single crime they had ever committed. Burglary, possession of drugs, forging of documents, assault, murder, rape, you name it. Including photo evidence of them carrying out these acts. I shivered, my body finally going numb. Each had their individual mugshots dating all the way back to the 19th century. It was undoubtedly my brothers, if I could even call them that anymore.

Oliver's mugshot was purely maniacal. His mouth was open, as if he was laughing at the camera.

Allen was restrained by the neck, someone holding him down for his picture.

François was screaming in his photo, eyes wide and teeth showing in malice.

And Matt. My brother. His clothes were stained with a darkness I knew too well. His smile was just as bloody.

I thought I heard someone talking, but I couldn't tell. All I could do was stare at the papers, as if they were my own death sentence. I didn't even flinch when America placed his hand on my shoulder. Slowly, my body seemed to work again.

"-didn't want you to know." He said. My eyes focused a little, though my vision was still foggy. My body felt like molasses.

"What?" Even in my muted state, I knew I sounded. . . quite not there. America heard it, too. He gave me a pitying look, a grimace on his face.

"We never wanted you to know the truth. We thought we were protecting you from it. I'm sorry you had to find out this way." I didn't even respond. I didn't know if I could. Everything felt unreal at that moment. It all seemed like a dream. In a minute, I would wake up back in my bed by Oliver nagging about how I needed to stop pulling all-nighters. Then, Matt and I would watch morning TV, and I would grudge about school and talk about my friends. Allen would make fun about my hair or my makeup, and François would just hand me a cigarette, taking a sip of his wine.

But I knew that was never going to happen again. That part of my life was over. I knew the truth now. The curtain had been pulled, I could see clearly now. But that didn't mean I didn't want to return back to the dark.


	10. Neuf

My brothers weren't difficult to understand. They were simple creatures whose main thoughts were to eat, sleep, drink, and annoy. The third one mainly being directed at me.

Oliver loved to eat. He was a caterer, working as a sort of freelance baker. There was always some sort of pastry in the house, mostly baking experiments and leftovers. Matt always warned me never to eat his cupcakes, though. They were experimental, he said, and they apparently tasted god awful. Though they smelled delicious, so I just always thought they were laced with weed or something. Not that I minded. Only a few times did I sneak a few, but Oliver always caught me in the act.

Matt loved to sleep. Though, I was exactly the same. Once I saw him go twenty-one hours without waking. Of course, that was after being awake for a solid three days, but I digress. He didn't really do much besides that. Asides from eating, he was essentially immobile for the entire day, except during hockey and hunting season. Though, he never came back with game which always confused me.

Out of all of my brothers we were the closest.

François loved to drink. From Chateau to Chardonnay, he could down just about anything. He didn't really do hard liquors, but he could empty a bottle in an hour. He spent most of his working money on booze and cigs, not that I cared much. He didn't break the family bank with his 'hobby,' so no one really cared much. He was a quiet drunk, which was a plus.

Allen loved to annoy.

Whether it was me or our brothers, he just like to bother us to no end. He would steal our food and hog the couch. He would make fun of anything from my hair to my height. There were so many short jokes that I simply grew accustomed to them. The only time he wasn't poking fun at me was when he wasn't there. The man had no filter and never shut his mouth.

They had their quirks, but they were just normal, older brothers. They basically let me do whatever I wanted with whoever I wanted. They housed my friends whenever. I told them more than most of my friends told their parents. Maybe it was the close age, or maybe it was because they were probably worse in their teenage years. I wasn't about to question my freedom lest it be taken away.

Sure it was tumultuous, but life was normal. And I liked it that way.

* * *

Mattie quickly lead me to the bathroom after I told him I felt sick. After so many times, I still wasn't used to the disgusting feeling of emptying out my stomach in the nearest bathroom. Luckily, this place was fully stocked with antacid tablets and mouthwash. I still looked a mess, though. I felt a mess, too.

When I walked out the bathroom, Mattie stood there while America took a heated phone call a few metres away. Mattie followed my gaze, shaking his head.

"Don't mind America. He's always like that. Always working, I mean." He turned back to me, worried. "Are you..." he stopped himself. "Look, I know you're not okay. I get that. Just tell me if there's something you need me to do, and I'll do it." Vaguely, I was reminded of my conversation with Fae a few weeks ago. It was funny how, in that moment, Mattie sounded just like me.

"I think we should go. Too many people here. I don't like it." I was getting claustrophobic with so many eyes on me. The pressure of the situation was sinking in. He nodded, and I let him take my hand. He walked quickly over to the Nation on the phone.

"Alfred. We're leaving." He glanced back at us, quickly ending the call. I didn't look at him, just staring down the hall. He placed his phone in his coat pocket.

"Alright. I just called the driver. He'll be here in a few minutes." For once, he stayed silent, avoiding my gaze. I said nothing.

The next hour felt like an eternity. America's and Mattie's words just went in one ear and out the other. The meeting lasted much longer than I thought. It was already getting dark when we left the building. America had his men grab food and raw ingredients in the city. I vaguely remembered the drive to the safe house, the security men leaving with our driver. It was just the three of us in that big house.

I didn't speak to either of them for the rest of the night.

I didn't speak to them the next morning, either. I could tell that they wanted to talk to me, but they were either too embarrassed or too ashamed to do so. I just grabbed some ingredients from the kitchen as soon as I could and began cooking. Obviously, I let them eat some. It was practically torture to deprive someone of my amazing cooking skills. They were lucky, though, that I didn't spit in their dishes. It was nice to cook for someone again. It was almost therapeutic, in a way.

They were also lucky there was a TV with international channels. It helped me keep my mind off of my situation, but it also sucked because it reminded me of watching TV together with Matt and Allen. The pros outweighed the cons, I finally decided.

I tried ignoring the guys for a few days, but it didn't help that I had absolutely no one else to talk to. The anger in my chest just kept growing and growing until I thought I might explode.

I tried to keep it in for as long as I could, to just keep my problems to myself. But I finally broke ten days into my silence strike.

We were eating lunch in the safe house. I had already run out of ways to occupy myself. I watched and rewatched tv. I made more food than I could possibly stomach, though I never gained much weight. I was sick usually at least once a day. Stress was probably the cause. I had gone into the city more times than I could count. I was getting cabin fever, and all of my frustration and fear finally came out.

"You didn't tell me," I finally said. The two flinched, eyes going wide. I hadn't said anything for so long. I guessed they were surprised that I was bringing it up. "You just waited for someone else to do it. I looked like an idiot in the meeting, not knowing about my own housemates," I refused to call them family anymore. "And you waited for someone else to tell me." They stayed silent, and I shook my head.

"Do you know how terrible I felt? These complete and utter strangers, most of them probably didn't even like me, knew more about my them than I did." I got some feelings back into my body, my head tingling. "You had so many chances to tell me, but you didn't." My voice rose, rage bubbling in the pit of my stomach. "And you," I turned to Mattie, venom laced in my voice. "All this time. You've known me for weeks. But you said nothing."

"Look, I know you're mad-"

"Oh, I'm absolutely pissed. And don't think for a second that I will ever forget this." There was a long pause, and for a while I didn't think they were going to answer at all. Then America rubbed the back of his neck, sighing softly.

"I know." He looked extremely guilty, staring at the ground. "And I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, too." Mattie added.

"But we were just trying to protect you," America's words were quick, as if he felt he didn't have enough time to get them out. Maybe he was right to think so. With the passing days, time was running out. Running out, time moved too slowly and too quickly at the same time. "I thought that maybe you'd be better off without the information. I'm sorry. Can you ever forgive us?" I thought hard, the rage clouding my mind.

"No." The boys flinched. A pause. "At least not yet. It's gonna take me a long time to trust you again." The irony was not lost on me that Fae gave me the exact same speech over a month ago. I tried not to think about it too much. I let out a bitter laugh, tears quickly springing in my eyes. "Besides, I still have to come to terms with the fact that my entire ex-family was a bunch of cold blooded criminals." I bared my teeth. They each gave me shocked looks that I would say something so blunt. But at that moment, I didn't care. Nothing really mattered anymore. Everything had just turned into one big ball of numbness and confusion.

Because those were my feelings. More often than not I was simply...gone. My mind was elsewhere, and my body felt the same way. It's as if it wasn't me. I wasn't me anymore living that crazy life. Everything just felt so far off from reality that it was hard to believe anything at all was real. It was such a frequent feeling that I wondered if I would ever get used to it.

"Maelynn, look. Everything that happened- look, I can't say that everything's going to be okay," America said. "Promises, we Nations don't deal in those. But I'm trying my hardest to fix things. Mattie is, too. But just know that-"

You know how in movies phones ring at the most inopportune time? Well, turns out that situation isn't as fictional as most people like to think.

America sighed. Slowly leaving me and Mattie to just stare at one another, he up the phone. There was silence.

"Bravo charlie five seven whiskey lima." It seemed to be a secret code he uttered. There was a pause, and then he put his head in his hands. "Shit. You're cert- yeah I know you wouldn't call if it weren't true. It's just- yeah, I know. You've told me that for decades. I get it. I gotta go." He hung up and sighed. For a moment he just sat there staring at the floor. He suddenly seemed to remember that he wasn't alone, and he turned to us, smiling wearily.

The two of us looked at him for answers. He ran a hand through his hair.

"Don't freak out, but we have to move houses."

The world spun, and for a moment I thought I didn't hear him correctly. It was so calm, so straightforward that the words didn't sink in for a while.

"Have they found us?" My voice was so low I doubted they heard me. But America shook his head.

"We've been off their trail for a while. A few people have said the Anti League are looking around for you. We need to move locations soon." I nodded.

"It's a pretty normal thing to do," Mattie said. "Even if we don't think we're being followed, we like to move locations a lot just in case." I didn't speak. "We'll probably stay in the country. Alfred's got good relationships with some Atlantic states, and we'll stay away from the Great Lakes area."

"Yeah! And you'll love the state personifications. They're super cool, and I bet a lot of them would love to meet you. There's Marcus and Tom and Jed...actually Jed doesn't really like anyone who isn't from S.C. But still!"

I could tell he was trying to cheer me up. I knew, and yet his grin was so wide and his eyes so bright that I couldn't stop a small smile from forming. I couldn't quite tell, but I thought he looked relieved. I turned to Mattie.

"How often are we going to move?" He shrugged.

"It depends. Every time we hear news that the Anti-League is on our trail, we'll have to pack our bags." Suddenly he thought of something. "Don't worry. We'll get you a proper wardrobe soon enough." It was such a mundane thing to think about. I didn't even realize that, for all intents and purposes, the only thins that belonged to me anymore were the clothes on my back. The idea was such a normal, such a _privileged_ problem that I hadn't even realized the problem existed until that very moment. "It could be every month, it could be every day. It just depends."

And depend, I soon learned, it would. 

"When are we leaving?" America paused. Mattie and I exchanged glances. The American sighed, giving me a sheepish grin.

"Now?"

"Now?" I said. There was silence. 

It is difficult to describe the new feeling of uncertainty which suddenly pervaded my entire existence. The sentiment was not some aspect of my life which faded in and out with the passing days. This uncertainty, this feeling of not knowing what the next second would hold, was, in fact, my life. It was exhilarating, not in the conventional sense, and left my pulse racing and head spinning. It was terrifying at some times and sobering at others. I knew my life hung in the balance, and this allowed me to truly evaluate my own, fragile existence. 

My life was no longer my own. I wondered if it had ever been. I was always with some sort of higher authority. First my adoptees and then the Nations. My life belonged to the Personifications before I even knew it. My fate rested in their hands. I wasn't entirely all that important. In this entire, international instance, at least. But I was not so naïve as to think I was nothing, either. I mattered. Whether for better or worse, it didn't really matter. I was important enough to protect according to the Nations. This should have felt liberating, There I was, having some sort of impact on the world whichever way I turned. But I felt more shackled than ever before. I didn't matter. My feelings didn't matter. All that mattered was that I was kept in the Nations' care. That I was kept safe. 

My eyes set, and they must have noticed. Make no mistake, I still held no real resolve. My body shook and my hands trembled. Sweat gathered in my palms and perspiration appeared on my forehead. But I could only assume from their joint expressions that I held some semblance of resolve in my eyes. Smoke and mirrors.  It wasn't real. I was terrified. But none of that mattered. It never did. I nodded.

"Now."


End file.
